


Drag Me To Hell

by jhunieilarde



Category: The Order (TV 2019)
Genre: Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, F/F, F/M, vermish
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-24
Updated: 2020-08-28
Packaged: 2021-03-06 23:20:40
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 12
Words: 25,554
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26077105
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jhunieilarde/pseuds/jhunieilarde
Summary: Set after the end of Season 2.Vera remains powerless and tries to deal with the aftermath of it. After learning of a newly appointed leader of Praxis, Lilith's return and Alyssa's resurrection, she must deal with the impending return of a past she buried to the ground as it became the consequence of her disciples' actions.(vermish mode but continuation of the series; Vera left to deal with their messes again but it might cost a lot on her part)
Relationships: Alyssa Drake/Jack Morton, Hamish Duke/Vera Stone, Lilith Bathory/Nicole Birch, Randall Carpio/Gabrielle Dupres
Comments: 16
Kudos: 73





	1. Withdrawals

**Author's Note:**

> Just finished binge watching season 2 of the Order so i got inspired because it's so short! I just felt that Vera got the short end of the stick this season because she has so much good intention and she protects the Knights even they don't think that's what she was doing. If it was up to the Council, the wolves would have been killed after season 1 but Vera being appointed as Grand Magus, she chose to just powder them instead of killing them because she does not want them to die, thus, saving their lives. She welcomed them to the Order even though everyone is against it and then they robbed her to 'get their stuff back' which would have been fine if they only took theirs but they took everything and screwed up Vera's plan to contain Rogwan and it cost them Lilith. It resulted to an almost war with the Order and Sons of Prometheus which Vera cured by letting them in her mind to convince them not to kill Jack. That gave Kepler a reason to overthrow Vera and then Alyssa began her tantrum about her magic and Vade Maecum then stripped Vera her magic while she was trying to prevent an apocalypse and after she gave Alyssa what she wants, she did not return her magic leaving her powerless at the end. It's so messed up how they screwed Vera up when all she ever did is protect them and clean up their mess, so yeah...this is me ranting because she deserves better.

Headaches…she won’t stop having headaches ever since it all ended. Alyssa Drake is dead and she took her magic to her grave with her. She is a powerless Grand Magus. She almost laughed at the thought. Hamish does his best in covering for her, performing ceremonies and rituals in her behalf so the others will not know she lost her magic. If the Council finds out it’s gone, they will easily dispose her and appoint a new Grand Magus. It would be fine for her since being a leader of the Hermetic Order of the Blue Rose is beginning to lose its appeal to her but that would also mean the amnesty she signed for the Knights will be void and they will hunted down and killed by the new Grand Magus. She has to hang on if she intends to protect them.

There is still no word from Jack and it’s been four months already. She was told that he is taking a personal time after he buried Alyssa. She respected that but she’s beginning to worry. She remembered him saying that he cannot live in a world without her and now, this is the world without her. She’s gone. Stupid, girl. If only she has returned her magic when she asked, she could have healed her when Midnight attacked her. Despite what happened, she still cares about her and she would have healed her. She has gone through every book she has in the temple but none can give her magic back to her. It got zapped and she’s left powerless. She just hoped that the Praxis won’t find a new leader just yet or she will be screwed. It’s clear that she will be the first target of that group after killing Salvador and now that Alyssa is dead. Killing the Grand Magus will be their top priority.

Hamish sticks around more often for that very same reason. He can sense that it’s going to happen and he wants to be there to protect her. He is werewolf and a practitioner. He is getting better with magic now that Vera is teaching him how to do more complicated spells for her. It is fun to learn magic and for her to be the one teaching her to do it but every time he sees the pain in her eyes due to the longing of using her magic again, it pains his heart. He wants to get her magic for her but there’s no use. He could have eaten Alyssa’s heart for Vera and he would do it without blinking an eye if it was not for Jack. Now, Alyssa is dead and Vera is magicless and miserable.

“Are you okay?” he asked when he saw her wincing.

It’s happening often, the headaches. She tries to hide it but he’s very attentive.

“Fine. Just headache”, she answered.

“Want me to heal that for you?” he offered.

“There’s no need. It’s just withdrawal”, she declined.

He frowned. 

“What do you mean withdrawal? From magic?” he asked again.

There is so much he needs to learn but she does not expect him to learn it all in speed. She spent her whole life in the Order. What she knows cannot be learn by Hamish in months.

“I was way younger than our youngest acolyte when I started doing magic. My body is so used to having it and now that it’s gone, it still thinks that it’s there. I am having reactions”, she explained.

He can finally make sense now of the things he observed from her during the last few months. Her hands sometimes shake. Her voice turns hoarse from time to time, the headaches, the dizziness. She fainted twice. The whole absence of her magic seems like a disease to her. Then, something crept up in his mind.

“Is it the Fors Factoram?” she shot him a look. “You performed it before and you said that it’s like a magic cancer. Is it affecting you now?” he followed up.

Honestly, she did not think of it that way. Yes, she performed it before and she had already seen the price but she thought it wouldn’t come around to bite her back in the ass.

“It could be. I don’t have any magic to protect me now but it had already claimed something from me. I’m not sure what more it wants”, she answered coldly.

He flinches. It had already claimed something from me? What does she mean? He wants to ask her more but she looked so much in pain and he does not want to add more to her suffering so he held it back.

The door suddenly opened and the rest of the cavalry arrived, with Jack Morton. Her eyes became glued to his, searching for any concern for worry. She wants to ask him how he is doing but that would be a stupid question to ask. She knows what it’s like to lose someone and she would not want to hear that question directed towards her. Jack seemed to acknowledge her sensitivity to not rub a salt to the wound. They just nodded at each other, reaching an understanding silently.

“What’s this all about?” she asked them.

“Praxis appointed a new leader”, Randall answered.

Vera sighed. She can already sense a war coming her way and she does not have the magic to defend herself and her Order.

“Who is it?” Hamish asked for her.

“Kelvin Trenton, he’s a tourist. We don’t know much of him yet”, Gabrielle answered.

Vera has been made aware that she is now also a werewolf. After all, it was her hide that killed Alyssa. She turned to Jack to grasp anything from his reaction but he remained passive. Something felt off.

“Well, better go find out more about him. I would like to know what we’re dealing with or we should be concerned”, she said.

Gabrielle nodded. Even with her newly acquired strength and power, she is still afraid of Vera Stone. Not only because she’s the Grand Magus, but something in her screams authority and Gabrielle does not want to mess with that. She wants to prove herself to her, do not let her down, make her proud. It may look pathetic how much she craves her approval but she looks up to her. She wants to be as strong and as powerful as her someday even she does not have her magic right now. It does not make her any less powerful and that says a lot how much she admires and fears her.

“There’s one more thing”, Randall said.

Hamish looked at him, obviously saying no but Vera caught him eyeing the other wolf.

“What is it?” she asked promptly.

“Lilith!” he yelled and Lilith came in her office.

Vera’s eyes widen upon seeing her with the mark on her face. She is aware that they tried to bring her back on their own but Hamish did not tell her they succeeded. Her head immediately snapped towards him and he felt utterly guilty.

“I see”, she composed herself trying to grasp what’s in front of her, “Anyone care to tell me which spell you used to bring back Ms. Bathory?” she asked calmly.

Too calm, Jack thought. Even Hamish sensed the same. Vera is thinking of something, probably worried about something or she would not use that tone.

“The Demon Realm Incantation, Grand Magus”, Nicole answered.

Vera breathes in deeply. “…and who exactly did you sacrifice?” she asked again.

They all frowned except for Randall.

“Two owls”, Hamish answered without doubt.

“Two owls”, Gabrielle, Nicole, and Jack said at once.

Vera’s eyes found Randall.

“Two owls”, he said passively.

“It’s not that I am not happy to see Ms. Bathory back in our realm because I am but I seemed to remember telling you that I will help you once I was done dealing with the eruptions and you all went on ahead and did it behind my back”, she expressed.

“We got her back”, Randall said defensively.

“Yes, Mr. Carpio. You did. You brought her back without cutting off her ties with the Demon Realm as evident on the marking on her face. It would not have been there if you have waited for me because the spell I would have used will include severing her connection to that realm entirely. Now, I know you’re thinking that it would be impossible because I lost my magic but I wouldn’t have to do anything because all of you would have performed the ritual because you’re all her comrades and that would not have required a sacrifice of TWO OWLS”, that last two words were directed at Randall.

Vera knows. She knows he had killed someone for Lilith and usually she would admired his loyalty and love for his friend but there’s a strong feeling in her that he might have chosen someone with high importance and that would be a problem.

“Can you cut off her ties now?” Gabrielle asked.

Lilith looked alarmed. She obviously stayed there too long and the mark is making her more lenient towards the Demon Realm. Vera and Lilith looked at each other and for a moment, a connection was established. While looking at the young wolf’s eyes, Vera saw something else. It sent shivers down her spine that she has to break away.

“I will look into it. In the meantime, find me information about Kelvin Trenton. You’re all dismissed”, she answered.

Everyone left except for Jack. Their talk is quite overdue and she’s beginning to think that he’s only there to tell her something bad.

“Please, tell me you did not do something idiotic like that”, she muttered.

Her brain is getting drained from dealing with all of their messes. She’s been cleaning up after them again and again and it’s taking a toll.

“Alyssa is back. She can return your magic. We already discussed it and she agreed if you will leave her alone. She also won’t be coming back to Praxis and she will return the Vade Maecum and the Fors Factoram for her amnesty”, he revealed.

There’s too much information in what he said, it took her few seconds to absorb it.

“You used to Vade Maecum to bring her back”, she concluded.

“I paid the price”, he said.

“…with what? A gallon of your blood? Few fingers?” he shrugged and she sighed. “No. Mr. Morton, you haven’t paid the price. You just think that you did. Oh my god…I can’t believe I have to deal with this right now”, she replied.

It got him confused. In his brain, it all worked out. Alyssa finally yielded after coming back from the dead. They can finally secure Vera’s position as Grand Magus with her power restored. She will have the book and Fors Factoram. What more can she possibly want?

“I thought you will be happy. You don’t want Alyssa to die. I saw that on your face. You would have helped her if you have your magic that day”, he said.

Vera pressed her hand on her temple. The headache could not pick a better timing.

“I would, Mr. Morton, but what you did cost more than blood and limbs. That kind of sacrifice is not enough for the Vade Maecum”, she turned to face him, “Have you ever wondered why I haven’t used it while it was in my possession?” she asked and he shook his head in response. “…because I could not pay the price it’s asking. I kept it in the hope that I can find a way to bring my daughter back without killing anyone or causing something terrible but there’s no workaround so I did not do it no matter how much I want to have her back and you just went on ahead and did it without asking me first”, she added.

He wanted to argue that it’s the only to get Alyssa back, that he cannot live without her, but something stopped him when he saw winced again. She pressed both her hands on her head this time, trying to suppress the pain but it’s getting worse.

“Are you okay, Vera?” he asked in concern.

“With what, Mr. Morton? Dealing with potential threat to my life by the new head of Praxis? The consequences of Ms. Bathory’s connection with the Demon Realm? Or the cost of your resurrection spell with Ms. Drake?” she asked sarcastically.

The pain got worse, if that’s even possible, and she groaned. It’s not withdrawal. She knows that now. It is not supposed to hurt that much. It’s not magical cancer either. Something is wrong and she cannot pinpoint what. She heard Hamish entering the room and tried to talk to her but his voice is getting far from her ears. Her vision is getting blurry. She’s going to pass out. Just as her consciousness goes, something came into view. A figure that looks so familiar to her. Her heart beats faster. It cannot be, she thought, but she cannot do anything. She drifts further until everything went black.

‘I have waited long to find you again, Vera. We will see each other soon and we will finish what we started…’


	2. Story of a Witch

The group discussed what’s wrong with the Grand Magus at the bar while Hamish tends to her side in her office. They are aware about the loss of her magic but they just learned that it’s taking a toll on her health ever since she was stripped of her magic. Jack had promised Hamish that Alyssa will return her magic to her and she did right after Jack had called her to do it. She did it from a distance. She remains in hiding because Vera did not get a chance to give her an amnesty before she passed out. The return of her magic should help her recover from the headaches and the withdrawal as Hamish told them.

“This is bad. Grand Magus does not deserve to go through this”, Gabrielle muttered.

“Does not deserve? In case, you forgot she gave you the order to wipe our memories for a year”, Randall argued.

“Yes, to keep you alive, you moron! The Council wanted all of you dead for being a werewolf and Grand Magus used her position to persuade them otherwise. Her only option is to assure them you’re no threat and that means wiping your memories to prove to them that she had dealt with all of you. If she had not done that, the Council will send Adeptis after your asses and you will all be dead by now”, Gabrielle argued back.

“She took our stuff including our lockers”, Lilith butted in which made Gabrielle rolled her eyes around.

Of course, she will support Randall.

“…but they don’t belong to us, not really”, Lilith looked at Jack. “We were originally part of the Order. The Knights are the protector of the Order which means all the Knights have including the lockers belonged to the Order. We just did not know it back then”, Jack intervened as Gabrielle gestured towards him in approval.

“So, the Grand Magus is now receiving the end of all the consequences of our actions, like a ripple effect”, Nicole concluded and everyone agreed.

They stayed silent for a bit, contemplating how much they screwed Vera up. Jack, mainly, felt responsible. He initiated the whole magic heist thing which started it all. If anyone is to blame Vera’s predicament, it’s him.

“How is she?” Gabrielle asked when Hamish joined them.

“Awake and serious. She’s a little bit weak but she wanted to be alone. Her magic is back so she’s healing herself little by little”, Hamish answered.

“…but”, Randall sensed there’s more.

“I don’t know. Something is bothering her when she came to. I know that look on her face. It was the same look when she realized the Praxis caused a Tartarus eruption. She’s that worried. Of course, she won’t tell me anything. I am feeling something big is coming up”, he continued.

For some reason, they can all feel that same sense of danger. It’s thick in the air and they cannot quite make it up until Lilith speaks.

“You need to cut my connection to the Demon Realm. He knows where she is now and he will come for her”, she said.

All heads turn to her.

“What is this now?” Jack asked.

“is it Rogwan?” Gabrielle followed up.

“No. Someone far worse. Marcus, the Emperor of Death”, Lilith answered.

That sounds worse to their ears. They had a taste of an emperor demon and it did not end well. For Lilith to say this new emperor is far worse than Rogwan is enough to terrify them.

“What does he want with Vera?” Hamish finally asked.

It could be the obvious answer of her being the Grand Magus. The Demon Realm seems to want to eliminate the head of the Order so there will be no one to stop them from surfacing to this realm and Vera is a big threat to them.

“When I was there, I was told of a story. A young witch has performed a very dangerous spell that would claim her own life in order to save others. She succeeded in her purpose but the spell claimed her life faster than anticipated. Moments before her last breath, Marcus appeared. Apparently, the danger she saved everyone from was him and she stopped his plans in killing everyone so to exact his revenge on the witch, he saved her life. It took a few days before the witch’s child died. Marcus spared her life so she could watch her child die. That was his revenge. In her anger, the witch attacked him with more power than he had ever seen any practitioner possessed and sent him back to the Demon Realm leaving him with not enough power to resurface during Rogwan’s window every 27 years. Marcus had been trapped in the Demon Realm dreaming one day he will find a way to come back and kill the witch who humiliated him”,

Everyone is hanging on to her story, eager to learn what she knows.

“I thought it was just a story they circulated in that realm to make them wary of witches and warlocks. I did not believe it until today when I looked in Vera’s eyes. I don’t know what happened but I heard his voice in my head, Marcus, and I saw that Vera saw something else in my eyes. She probably heard him too. That’s when I realized that the story was real. The witch in the story is Vera Stone”, Lilith finished.

“Alright, how can it be the Grand Magus? First of all, the witch in the story had a child. Grand Magus does not have one. Second, the kind of spell that almost killed the witch in the story is something the Grand Magus will not perform herself”, Gabrielle objected.

Jack and Hamish looked at each other for a moment before coming to an agreement.

“Vera had a daughter”, that silenced them all. “She died when she was a baby. It’s not common knowledge in the Order. I learned it after she drank the mind juice to save my life”, Jack revealed.

“…and Vera had performed the Fors Factoram before although she never told when and why. It’s how she knew the cost of the spell and why she did not want to give it to Salvador and Alyssa”, Hamish added.

“Well, that sums it all up. Vera is the witch that pissed off Marcus. What now?” Randall asked.

“We cut my bond with the Demon Realm to prevent Marcus from reaching out to Vera. In the meantime, I cannot be anywhere near her or he will see what I see. I’m like a conduit now. They’re window to this realm”, Lilith answered.

It is why Vera was pissed that they did not wait for her to rescue Lilith her way. They messed up again.

“I will research how to do that”, Nicole volunteered.

“Alright, the rest of you keep working on Praxis and I will keep an eye on Vera, make sure no demon or tourist practitioner gets to her”, Hamish said.

Jack already knows his job. He needs to get the book and the Fors Factoram from Alyssa. Despite promising she will not use them, he knows how tempting it can be and Alyssa felt lost at the moment.

When Hamish got inside the office, Vera is already back to normal. Her cheeks are rosy again and she’s working on her desk like nothing happened.

“Are you done talking about me, Mr. Duke?” she asked without looking at him.

She knows. Of course, she does.

“Marcus”, is the only thing he needs to say to rattle her up.

Vera put her pen down.

“What do you want to know?” she asked.

“I accept whatever you will tell me but I will appreciate it if you tell me everything”, he answered.

They reached an agreement few months back that she will work on letting him in so he can help her and take care of her. With her magic back, she does not intend on going back her words but that part of her past has been so lost to her for years, it’s hard to even think about it. The only thing that is compelling her to talk is the fact that she will not be the only one in danger once Marcus crossed realms.

“Ms. Bathory summed it up pretty well. I was sixteen when I was recruited into the Order. I was pregnant at the time but my mentor, the current Grand Magus at the time, saw my potential and agreed to help me with my daughter. He took me in, trained me, up until I gave birth. Then, chaos happened. A stupid practitioner performed a spell unsupervised which caused a rift between this realm and the Demon realm. Marcus got out and started causing havoc. None of the Order members’ magic are working. They were bound by restrictions and consequences to perform what’s needed”,

Vera magic herself a glass of scotch and took a sip.

“I gave my daughter to my Mentor and performed the Fors Factoram to myself to allow me to use powerful spell without limitation. I knew it will kill me and I accepted it. I get to save my daughter and everyone else from a demon. It was worth it. I was able to prevent Marcus from ending the world by tampering his power to cause death. After that, the Fors Factoram began to claim my life as the price for the spell. I did a powerful one so it accelerated the effect. Marcus stopped me from dying. I suppressed his ability to inflict death but not his other powers”,

Hamish took her drink away and handed her something better.

“I always wondered why he did it. Then, few days later, my daughter died from anaphylactic shock from an allergic reaction she never had. She was born healthy. I realized then why Marcus saved my life. He cannot inflict death but he bestowed an allergy to my daughter hoping that I would inflict death on my own daughter and watch her die and he succeeded. The Vade Maecum was far from my reach at that point and there’s no other book that could provide me with resurrection spell to bring her back. Meanwhile, Marcus roamed around the realm unable to inflict death on anyone, just putting triggers here and there like what he did to my daughter. I summoned him and because I performed Fors Factoram and Marcus removed its side effects, I was left able to do any spells I want without paying the sacrifice. I hit him with everything that came to mind until he could not even raise a finger. Then, I sent him back to hell knowing that he would be alive but not powerful enough to return”, she finished along with her drink.

Hamish stared at her for a moment before fixing himself a drink.

“You did what he did to you. Torture, you kept him alive so he can endure the pain of existing and being unable to inflict death like what he was born to do just like he kept you alive so you can bear days without your daughter”, he pieced it together.

She raised her glass, impressed how quick he can comprehend everything.

“Well, with Ms. Bathory’s connection with the Demon Realm, he may just have found a way to get through. It’s been more than 20 years. He must have mustered enough strength to do that by now”, she expressed and kept drinking.

“I thought it’s a Grand Magus thing to be able to perform spells without slicing up your palm each time. It was the Fors Factoram. You can do spells without sacrifice and without price because you already almost died for it”, she did not respond. “Vera, you could have taken out Praxis by yourself and Salvador…and Alyssa!” he exclaimed at the realization.

A smile played upon her lips as she nursed the new drink Hamish made for her.

“I could have but how would that differentiate me from Edward Coventry or Foley or Salvador Grant…even Alyssa Drake? That would make me worse of a monster than all of them and as much fun as the dark magic can be, I try to play fair as much as I can. It was not easy but I try. Having unrestricted magic is all good as long as it’s being kept in check and that’s what I do”, she explained.

It made him admire her even more. He wouldn’t have known what he will do if he unrestricted magic. He would have taken out their enemies in a flash. Vera was right. That would only make him worse than their enemies. Her restraint on herself is incredible. She keeps doing everything by the book even though she does not need sacrifices for her spells and rituals, she still tries to follow the rules. It’s rare for her to cast spell without sacrifice and when she does, it’s for emergency purposes. She keeps herself in check all the time which explains how guarded she is.

“You can never be a monster, Vera. Your heart will prevent you from becoming one. As for Lilith’s connection with the Demon Realm. We’re working on finding the spell to do that. Marcus is not getting through and he’s not going anywhere near you”, he assured her although she already knows dark days are already ahead.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Vera did cast spells sometimes without slicing her palm like the time she stopped that girl who was infected with magical parasite from getting near her. She pushed her away without any sacrifice so it only made sense when Hamish concluded that she performed Fors Factoram before and she did not respond. She's one powerful witch.


	3. Ms. Drake

The team worked with finding spell that will break Lilith’s connection to the Demon Realm. Meanwhile, Jack went to where Alyssa is hiding to inform her of what’s happening. He explained what Hamish had relayed to her detail by detail in order to make her understand Vera’s point of view.

“You really are on her side”, she muttered.

“I know you still feel mad that she lied about the Vade Maecum but she just wanted her daughter back. She did not even use it. She kept it so she can find a way to tweak it so there will not be any human sacrifice or she will not cause another eruption but she figured out there’s nothing else so she just kept it hidden”,

“She still lied”, she interrupted.

“…and I bet she would have told you the truth if you asked her in some other time. You caught her in a bad time when you brought it to her attention. Her inventory was missing. Praxis kept contributing to the eruption and Kepler was going after her for saving my life from the Sons of Prometheus. She had asked for you to come back so she could explain things but you made another choice. Vera is not Coventry and for a while I debated about that but when I allowed myself to think clearly, I confirmed it”, he explained.

“If she used Fors Factoram, why can’t she resurrect her daughter without sacrifice? The spell allows her to perform magic without sacrifice”, she then asked.

Jack sighed.

“…because she said the resurrection spell asked more than blood and limbs for the cost of bringing someone back to life. She did not specify what but if someone like her who has unrestricted magic wouldn’t want to take the risk to get her own child, it must have been big”, he answered.

Alyssa weighed in things. Of course, she looked up to Vera. In fact, she worshiped her once and was determined to do anything to please her but after her magic went haywire, she felt neglected. Vera benched her. Looking at it now with fresh eyes and mind fresh from the afterlife, she realized how petty she was back then. Vera had benched her so she can deal with urgent matters on hand. They were facing demon, stolen artifacts, blood parasite, and an apocalypse. Like what Jack said, she had a lot on her plate including the politics. She was so angry at being kept in the dark that she lashed out on her and it cost her, her own life. She needed to die to see her faults in the picture.

“I know a spell that will cut Lilith’s ties to the Demon Realm”, she muttered.

\------------------------------

Everyone was shocked when Alyssa showed up at the den with Jack. Of course, they all knew she’s back but she contributed in the mess with Praxis that they all felt off with her in the same room. Alyssa felt that too. She used to be welcome in the den but now, it’s different. Hamish is particularly not happy to see her. He was there when she stripped Vera off her magic. 

“She knows how to cut Lilith’s connection to the Demon Realm”, Jack finally said so they can all calm down.

“Alright, devil’s advocate…why should we trust your girlfriend now? She’s with Praxis and she took the Grand Magus’ magic so she can blackmail her into giving her the Fors Factoram, voluntarily causing the Tartarus eruption to force the Grand Magus’ hands. Now, she suddenly wants to help”, Gabrielle asked.

The Midnight in her is coming out. Not only her hide is pissed with Alyssa, but she as well for betraying the Order.

“It’s Lilith”, Jack answered for her.

“Really? When you asked for her help to return to lockers to get Lilith back, did she just hand them to you?” Gabrielle retorted.

“No. She asked something in return, to be tipped off the next raid to save her Praxis friends”, Hamish answered.

Gabrielle scoffed. Lilith just looked at her former best friend.

“We could have gotten her back sooner and the war with the Praxis could have ended faster and the eruption would not have happened”, Nicole chimed in.

All of the things they said were true. Alyssa knew that now. Death has given her a better perspective. She deserves to be distrusted.

“I deserve those and you should not trust me. I wouldn’t trust me either. I got the spell and you can perform it without me. I just want to make up for everything”, she finally said and handed Randall the spell to break the connection Lilith has with the Demon Realm.

Gabrielle and Nicole inspected it and once satisfied, they both nodded.

“We’re taking this to the Grand Magus”, everyone frowned at her, “What? I am not doing another big spell behind her back. We can’t keep screwing up”, Gabrielle exclaimed.

“She’s right. Let’s go to the temple”, Hamish walked towards Jack, “…your girlfriend may come but keep her far from Vera. If she does anything to hurt her again, I am eating her heart”, he whispered to his friend.

\--------------------------------

At the temple, they found other disciples cleaning up after a ritual. None of them was informed of any scheduled ritual. They found Vera by her office surrounded by books and old scriptures of spells. The seriousness in her face disappeared and was replaced with complete frustration and annoyance when she saw them with Lilith.

“Well, that was a complete waste of ingredients and time. I just performed a demon barrier spell around the temple only for you to break it by bringing Ms. Bathory inside the temple”, Vera expressed.

“We got the spell to cut her connection to the Demon Realm but we need your help in doing it. Last time we did not wait for you, well, this happen”, Randall explained.

She appreciates that they learn now to consult her first before doing something stupid but she’s been exhausted from the preparation and the ritual and the research to let them know that. She just wants it to get over with.

“Where did you get the spell?” she asked.

None answered but they need not. Vera already saw Alyssa at the back with Jack. Her reflexes kicked in and silently put a protection around her magic so she will not be able to steal it again.

“Welcome back to the land of the living, Ms. Drake”, she muttered.

Alyssa was surprised that she did not retaliate. She did steal her magic and left her in pain for months. Her position as Grand Magus was put to risk. She should have turned her into a goat by now but she did not. Maybe Jack was right about her. She’s not Edward.

“Can we do it now here?” Hamish asked Vera.

The urgency in his voice let her know how much he’s worried about her. He wanted the connection to be cut as soon as possible to prevent Marcus from coming to their realm. It touches Vera despite knowing better.

“Of course”, he smiled in relief, “Make the arrangements”, she ordered and everyone scattered fast.

They have dismissed other acolytes and medicums present. It is a private matter and they will handle it themselves. There’s no need for innocent lives to be endangered if things go wrong. Alyssa helped but only minimal. They are keeping a close eye on her and they are wary she will try and sabotage the spell. Her eyes found Vera by the bar as she pressed her hand on her temple. She is still getting headaches despite getting her magic back. Jack told her that Vera told Hamish it’s just withdrawal but she should not be having it still because her magic is back. Hamish found her and offered her a drink which she accepted. She can see her eyes are worried and she’s doing her best to remain calm. From a distance, Alyssa was able to watch her carefully like a spectator. She always thought of her as being heartless, a robot, but from where she’s standing, she can see how human she is. She is a human who went through a lot and life hardened her. She built an incredibly thick wall around her which made it difficult for everyone to get through. Hamish tries. Vera tries to let him in as well but it’s not quite there yet.

“Grand Magus!” a man yelled.

It all happened like a slow motion in Alyssa’s eyes. A man they never met before showed up inside the temple, yelled Grand Magus and started throwing everyone to the wall. She saw him holding a knife, sliced his palm and his blood dropped onto the floor. The wolves tried to wolf out but they were subdued by the man’s spell. Alyssa turned to Vera by the bar who saw everything happened before her eyes in the same pace as hers.

“Long live Praxis!” the man continued and then casted a spell to attack Vera.

“Mors tua!” Vera casted back and a wave of force came out of her, shattering all the glasses behind her and sending the man flying backwards until he hit the wall so hard it broke his bones to bits.

Everyone gasped and went still. No one knows what to make of what just happened. They stared at the body of the man who seconds ago tried to kill the Grand Magus. Then, their eyes turned to her. Vera remained by the bar, surrounded by broken glass but none scratched her skin. Her breathing is rapid like she just ran a marathon. She focused on calming herself and getting control back. The pieces of glasses behind her are vibrating a little, like there’s tremor. She just casted a death spell in front of her disciple without sacrifice. They know about Fors Factoram but they’ve never really seen its full potential on someone who already paid the price and still able to live and use it.

“Are you okay?” Hamish asked.

“Fine. I just need a minute to settle down. Do clean this up. We have a spell to cast and for the love of God, take his body away before I lost my temper completely. After the problem with Ms. Bathory, I’m dealing with Praxis next”, she answered and walked back to her office.

Nicole and Lilith began sweeping the broken glass while Randall and Gabrielle took the body away.

“What does she mean by dealing with Praxis later?” Alyssa asked Jack.

Her question caught Haymitch’s ear.

“She meant, they’re going to pay for their assassination attempt on Grand Magus”, he answered.

“It’s not yet final. Emotions are a little high right now”, Jack tried to pacify the situation but it’s no use.

“It may only be an act of one man, not all of them”, Alyssa reasoned.

“Oh, you’re still one of them”, Hamish turned to Jack. “I thought you said she’s no longer with the Praxis”, he said.

“She’s not. She’s not connected to anything”, Jack confirmed.

“Just because I’m not part of Praxis anymore doesn’t mean I don’t care for their lives”, Alyssa snapped.

“Yeah, you care for their lives so much. You just stopped caring about the lives of everyone else”, Hamish snapped back.

Jack stood between them.

“Guys, this is not the time. We have something else to deal with”, he muttered.

“Vera just got attacked right in front of you by your precious Praxis who claims to be all about co-existence and you still think she’s the bad guy. You should have stayed dead. Everyone will be better off without you”, Hamish said.

“Not everyone”, Jack intervened which made Hamish scoffed.

“Then make up your mind. You cannot serve the Order and the Knight and be in love with an advocate of bad magic and free killing for equality at the same time”, Hamish replied and left them angrily.

Lilith and Nicole stared at them disapprovingly for a moment before resuming the cleaning. When Gabrielle and Randall returned, Hamish called Vera from her office. She seemed recovered and more in control than earlier. The room has been cleaned too.

“Alright, let’s start this spell and get it over with”, Vera announced.


	4. Channeling

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you so much for the positive feedback!!! i am glad you are enjoying this as much as i enjoy writing it.

The Order started to perform the ritual in cutting the bond between Lilith and Demon Realm. Vera led the ritual while Alyssa watched on the sidelines. The others don’t trust her to participate. Lilith stood in the middle of the circle as the others started chanting. It’s all going well up until Vera stop chanting.

‘Clever move to sever my eyes, witch’

The others frowned and looked at her with confusion. Lilith stiffened and met Vera’s eyes. The connection is there. 

“He wants to talk to you”, Lilith said.

“I am very aware of that, Ms. Bathory. Thank you very much”, Vera snapped, her eyes won’t leave hers.

It suddenly became known to everyone what’s happening. Marcus is communicating with Vera.

“You can hear him”, Lilith muttered.

She had previously guessed it but she did not think Marcus has that much power to actually reach out to Vera from the Demon Realm. Then again, he is an Emperor Demon.

“Can’t shut him up even if I want to”, Vera confirmed.

Everyone was alarmed including Alyssa. If Marcus can break through like that just through Lilith’s demon mark, he must have regain his strength that he lost to Vera years ago. It means that they’re going to be screwed once he gets out of the Demon Realm.

“He wants everyone to hear him speak”, Lilith informed them.

Vera already heard that and that made her scoffed. 

“Always been a narcissistic asshole…make it fast. I have an appointment to make later”, Vera agreed.

Lilith groaned a little before something in her demeanor changed. Vera straightened her back. She has not felt this tensed in a long while and she has not felt anger this much in a long while.

“Such hostility I sense in you, witch. Aren’t you happy to see me or rather talk to me?” Marcus’ voice came out of Lilith’s mouth.

“Not in the least. How’s Hell? Did you enjoy concealing to everyone you cannot inflict death to anyone?” she taunted.

Hamish felt a strand of fear creeping on him with her tone of voice. In fact, he’s not the only one. They all have seen Vera got angry before, multiple times, but she’s never been this filled with rage.

“I never thought of you to be ungrateful. After all, I saved your life. You should be thanking me”, he said proudly.

“Thanking you? You saved my life so I could watch my baby die. You killed her to make me pay for stopping you from killing everyone else”, she retorted.

He clicked Lilith’s tongue.

“…but, I did not kill your daughter, witch. You did. Your incompetence did. Your incompetence as a mother killed her because you failed to see that she’s allergic to that thing you called food you gave her. Your incompetence to save her in time killed your daughter. Your incompetence to do what’s needed to bring her back is what killed your daughter. It was all you and not me, witch”, he argued smugly.

Vera is basically boiling at this point. She is already considering killing Lilith just to hurt Marcus since he’s tied up to her telepathically but she still controlled herself.

“Are you done?” she asked.

“On that subject, pretty much, but with you, witch…far from it. I am actually thinking ways to make your death satisfying for my taste”, he answered.

Vera hummed. “Well, in that case, I guess I will be waiting for you right here. You know where to find me but in the meantime, keep rotting in wherever shithole you’re at right now because that’s all you can do”, she said.

Marcus, through Lilith, growled in anger. He clearly dislikes being belittled especially by Vera.

“Hoc vinculum erit amplius”, she suddenly casted and it pushed Marcus out of her mind.

Lilith groaned in pain and fell on her knees. The others gasped and ready to defend her from Vera but Lilith raised her hand to stop them.

“What the hell?” Randall exclaimed at Vera.

She did not respond and just waited for Lilith to get back on her feet. The demon mark is now gone from her face. The bond has been cut.

“I apologize for doing it abruptly. It was impulsive”, Vera apologized to Lilith.

“Don’t worry about it. It’s actually pissing me off to be a demon puppet”, Lilith replied.

“Is it over? No more connection to Demon Realm and all that?” Nicole asked.

Vera cleared her throat and stopped her fingers from fidgeting.

“That’s it. Now, clean this up. I have group of tourist practitioners to deal with”, she answered and walked away fast on her high heels.

\--------------------------------

Inside her office, she braced herself against the fireplace. She is failing to contain her anger inside her. Talking to Marcus again, hearing his voice, brought it all back. She spent years trying to forget what happened to her daughter. She put all her effort and energy to her work as the Chancellor of the university and the Grand Magus and it took one demon to bring it all back, to undo everything she’s done. It pisses her off to realize he holds that much power on her even from another realm.

The door opened and closed behind her. There’s no need for her to turn around to know who it is. There’s only one who comes in her office and actually has the decency to close the door.

“How are you holding up?” Hamish asked.

“Fine, Mr. Duke”, she answered coldly without turning around.

“Don’t. Stop doing that”, he said.

She is becoming aware that he’s closing the distance between them.

“I don’t know what you mean”, she muttered.

His hands touched her shoulders and slowly turned her around so he can see her face. His blue eyes are filled with concern for her. She wanted to retaliate for the pity. She does not like looking weak for other people. She got her magic back and she’s still the Grand Magus of the Order.

“Stop pushing me away when things are getting worse. I am not running away. I am here for you”, he said.

She knows that. She has always known that which scares her. No one has the balls like him to know what she’s capable, her impulses, her temper, and still choose to remain by her side. He discovered what she did with Bennett and the loom at the Praxis’ hideout. She caused the eruption and killed Bennett so the Council will grant her Imperium. He retrieved the loom and he’s still there. Most people will be appalled by her action and will run away from her but Hamish is different. He’s more stubborn than the rest.

“It’s not safe to be anywhere near me right now, Hamish. People are coming for me left and right. Praxis is still after my head, not to mention a demon who wants to kill me. I am hazard to everyone”, she said.

He smiled.

“Well, I am a werewolf and practitioner. I think I can defend myself and protect you”, he replied sweetly.

When did they get there? When she first inducted them to the Order, it was only to keep an eye on them, to keep them on a leash so they won’t make any stupid actions. It turned out, they still made a stupid action which almost cost them everything. She discovered the Knights have always been part of the Order and Hamish brought her that drink in her office that day with Kepler and things started to head in a different direction. She should not have asked him to make her another drink in a tall glass. That’s when it all started. She lost her control and let her guard down and let him in. She promised herself that she will not allow herself to get attached to anyone after her daughter died to avoid that kind of pain again and yet there she is, attached not only to Hamish but to her disciples who continue to disobey her and make idiotic choices.

“Well, we better get started with the Praxis. Having enemies left and right is getting exhausting. I want this to be over”, she said to him.

Hamish began telling her the information they gathered about Kelvin Trenton. Apparently, he is new and quickly ascend to leadership due to his radical point of views, same with Foley and Salvador. He was able to persuade other members to get on board with targeting the Order believing that as long as the Order, particularly Vera Stone, exists, Praxis will not. She recalled Salvador saying the same to her during their parley. She said it right before she tried to kill her by committing suicide. If only they learned about responsibility and conscience, they wouldn’t have this kind of problem. There is nothing wrong with wanting the world to be a better place but achieving it through blood bath and death toll is no better than the world they’re trying to change. It’s all the same, just different justification.

Their conversation was interrupted when Alyssa and Jack came in the office. Hamish quickly turned around and growled, threatening to wolf out. Jack put Alyssa behind his back. The others outside who are still cleaning up the residue of their previous ritual turned to them in alarm.

“We just want to talk with Vera, Hamish. Alyssa wants to talk to her. That’s all”, Jack said to a very angry Hamish and Tundra.

“I seem to remember the last time she was in this office, she knocked me out and stripped Vera of her magic. Forgive me for being hostile this time. I told you to keep her away from Vera”, Hamish snapped.

His eyes are glowing and his wolf teeth is showing. Alyssa braced herself. She can still remember being attacked and killed by a wolf and it hurt like hell.

“Hamish please…” Jack turned to Vera behind him. “Vera, she just wants to talk”, he pleaded to her instead.

“Mr. Duke, it’s fine. You and Mr. Morton can leave and join the others outside”, Vera intervened.

Alyssa was able to breathe in relief while Hamish turned to her in surprise.

“Are you sure you want to be alone in the same room as her?” he asked her.

“Quite sure”, she answered and he obliged despite his objection.

Jack and Hamish left the office and Vera waved her hand to close the door and locked it. Alyssa eyed the door. A frown appeared on her forehead when she saw it was locked.

“You’re not planning on killing me, are you?” she asked her.

“It depends on why you want to be here with me, Ms. Drake. I made a mistake trying to cast a simple immobilizing spell to you that time you came here and attacked me. I won’t make the same mistake again and your little trick with deflection will not work either”, Vera answered.

Alyssa does not doubt that, not right after she saw Vera used magic to a different degree earlier when she killed that Praxis member. 

“I came here to return these”, she said and put on her desk the Vade Maecum and the Fors Factoram. “Jack told me you want these back in return for my amnesty”, she added.

Vera examined it both carefully. The last time Alyssa left her the Vade Maecum, it turned out to be fake. Once satisfied, she produced a contract of amnesty for her. She has already signed it.

“I must say that it is a shame for the Order to lose a practitioner like you who got potential but the events that happened, I am not sure whether potential is enough to know if someone deserve to be part of the Order. This society has always been filled with overprivileged students even since then. They used its magic and power for their personal interests and justify it as something for a cause. It’s time to shake things up a bit”, Vera said.

Alyssa smiled. It’s what she’s been hoping to happen for the Order. She’s just became too impatient to wait for it.

“It’s a good thing Kepler has been sacrificed so she won’t be able to stop you”, she blurted out when she shouldn’t have.


	5. Broken Trust

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So i am imagining how would Vera react when she finds out about Kepler being used as a sacrifice. I can't imagine it to be pretty no matter how much they had disagreed before. They're relationship was more like sisters rivalry so it might hurt her to know she's dead. I also think it will be the test for Hamish whether he will choose to tell her and betray Randall or choose to keep Randall's secret and lie to Vera. For now, this is what i come up with.

“Excuse me?” Vera breathed out.

Alyssa stiffened. She must know, right? Hamish is always with her, he must have mentioned it. Vera must have asked how they were able to rescue Lilith from hell. She should have asked Jack first before saying anything.

“I thought…”

“Take your amnesty and leave. Good luck to your future endeavors, Ms. Drake, and please, for the love of God, do not start another retaliation with a bunch of wanna be’s. I decided not to wipe your memory so don’t make me regret this. You’re dismissed”, Vera cut her off and opened the door with a wave of her hand.

Alyssa reluctantly left her office. The others are waiting outside, praying there’s no bloodbath happening inside the office.

“Mr. Carpio! Mr. Morton! Mr. Duke! And Ms. Dupres! In my office now!” they heard Vera yelled from the office.

They all turned to Alyssa who looks incredibly guilty. The Knights except for Lilith went inside Vera’s office in concern. Vera immediately closed the door and locked it. Her face is unreadable. They saw the Vade Maecum and Fors Factoram sitting on top of her desk.

“I had given you a task before regarding the Vade Maecum. It was the rightful duty of the Knights to guard it for their Grand Magus. I had entrusted you back then because you showed bravery, honesty, integrity, and loyalty to the cause”, she said.

“Thank you, Grand Magus”, Jack said.

“I’m not quite finish”, the wolves frowned. “Tell me who did you sacrifice for the ritual you used in rescuing Ms. Bathory from the Demon Realm and don’t think of lying to my face again. It’s been a long day and my patience is running thin”, she finished.

The atmosphere in the room suddenly became tensed. No one has dared speaking of it ever since it happened. For them, it was a necessary sacrifice to get their friend back. None of them tried to look at it in a different angle and now they are being forced to do so as another side of it is starting to show. Vera waited for any of them to speak up. She wants to hear it coming from them although she’s sure Alyssa was not lying. Plus, the two owls answer is bullshit. They tried to make a fool out of her.

“Kepler”, Randall was the one who answered.

It was him who made that decision and it seemed promising at the time. He was desperate. Alyssa and Vera are closing the eruption soon and it’s the only time they’re going to get Lilith back. It’s the only way.

Vera almost sunk on her seat. She closed her eyes and pressed her fingers between her eyes, trying to control what’s left of her temper. It’s been a long day and she’s not sure if she will be able to contain the frustration any longer.

“In all the stupid decision you ever made, this is by far the stupidest, most idiotic thing you ever did”, her voice is unbelievably level. “Elizabeth Kepler was head of Gnostic Council, none of you ever thought of grabbing any other witch other than someone who’s disappearance will be noticed by, I don’t know, everyone?!” she finally exclaimed.

Gabrielle backed off. She never wanted to be on her bad side and now she is unconsciously, since she was possessed at the time of the ritual. It was Midnight who consented on it happening. Meanwhile, Randall became defensive.

“I did what I can in order to get Lilith back which is more than what I can say about you. You kept on promising to get her back when you’re not doing anything! Besides, Kepler had always been a pain in our asses. It’s like hitting two birds in one stone. At least, we got Lilith back”, he exclaimed back.

Vera is no longer calm. Honestly, the others are afraid she will kill Randall right then and there. Her face is slowly turning red in anger.

“Alright. You got Ms. Bathory back and everything you ever wanted came to pass. Congratulations, Mr. Carpio. Here’s a preview of what’s going to happen in the future so listen carefully. The Council is going to notice that Kepler is not on any vacation but missing. As the Head of Gnostic Council, they will insist on internal investigation about her disappearance. They will first go to the last site where she was seen which was the parking lot where she left Maddox by himself. The Council will then ask me to handpick Adeptis to form the search party. You better pray none of them will find any trace of wolf in that parking lot because when they do, their heads will turn here in Belgrave. Once you became suspect for her disappearance, your contract with the Order will be immediately terminated which means I can no longer protect you and since in their eyes, the Knights are the sworn enemy of the Order, they will give the verdict of death before they can even produce any evidence that you did it”,

It’s their time now to be scared. They know how everyone feels of their induction to the Order. It was only Vera who vouched for them and since she’s the Grand Magus, the others are powerless about it. Now, they have given the others reason to force Vera’s hand to step back and without her, they are totally screwed.

“Putting my trust in you has been a mistake. The Vade Maecum will remain under my care. You all have outdone yourselves and my disappointment level has reached a different level I cannot even begin to comprehend it. If I were you, I would start retracing my steps and cleaning up any trace of evidence before the Council sends the Adeptis. It’s your only hope. You’re all dismissed and don’t come into the temple unless I ask you to do so”, she said and opened the door for them.

None of them were able to say anything as she turned her chair to face the fireplace. The Vade Maecum and the Fors Factoram disappeared from her desk. Gabrielle, Randall, and Jack left the office but Hamish stayed. Instead, he closed the door.

“Vera”, he called for her attention.

“Did you know about this?” she asked without turning back.

“…only after it was done”, he answered.

She sighed out loud. In all of them, she thought she can count on Hamish the most. Jack is sometimes to passionate to see the bigger picture. Randall is completely impulsive like Lilith. Gabrielle is new and she has been possessed by her hide. She counted that Hamish will be their anchor, keep them in line. Apparently, she’s wrong. 

“So you have known about it for four months but you did not think to tell me?” Vera casually got up and turned to look him in the eye. “You were there with me when I was arranging for Maddox temporary guardian. You saw me trying to reach Kepler multiple times. You let me think of ridiculous things about where she is when you have known all along. Tell me why”, she asked.

Hamish could not be sorrier but it’s not easy to be in the middle between his pack and the woman he loves.

“I was worried about Randall. He’s my friend and my Knight brother”, he answered.

“…and you think I will crucify Mr. Carpio if you have told me? Wow, thanks for the vote of confidence, Mr. Duke”,

“Stop with that again”, he muttered.

“I’ve done nothing but clean up after you dogs and all I ask in return is for you to stop acting like a bunch of morons and let me know first if ever crazy ideas form in your little brains but you still failed in doing that. Now it’s too late to device any diversion or give the Council false lead to follow away from Belgrave. If you had told me months ago, I would still be furious but at least, I could have figured out something to cover your asses and prevent your impending death sentences but of course, why trust Vera Stone? She’s a cold-hearted bitch, right?” she snapped.

“I don’t think that of you, you know that”, he corrected.

“No, you just don’t trust me enough to tell me your wolf secrets when you demand me to open up to you”, they looked at each other for a second, “You know what, in all of these disappointments, I am more upset with you than them. I thought we understood each other. I thought I can count on you but I have never been wrong in my life. It was stupid of me to think this can work out. It was a fantasy and I need to get my head out of the water”, she said.

He wanted to plead, to get down on his knees and beg for her forgiveness but the pride in him prevented him in doing so.

“Vera, don’t do this. We can figure this out”, he muttered.

“It’s Grand Magus to you, Mr. Duke, and we are not figuring this out. This is your problem, your mess. You clean it up. After all, you’re the leader of the Knights, right? I told you. I cannot protect you anymore and I am tired putting myself on the line for ungrateful people like you and your pack. Better join the others in trying to save your skin before it’s too late”, she said coldly, her words digging deep in his heart.

“What about the Praxis? Kelvin Trenton?” he asked.

They got so much on their plate right now. There are people coming after Vera. He cannot leave her right now. He swore to protect her.

“No need for you to concern yourself with that, Mr. Duke. That is Order’s business and for me to worry about. Worry about your own problem. You’re dismissed. Please take your dogs with you on your way out”, she answered and opened the door for him.

This is not how he wants it to end. He does not even want it to end. For the first time in years since Cassie, he finally felt love again and it’s slipping away again from him and once again, it’s his fault. He walked out the door of her office and heard it slammed shut.

“Were you able to change her mind? Get her to help us?” Gabrielle asked in despair.

“Let’s go. The Grand Magus wants us out of the temple now”, he responded coldly.

\---------------------------------

Back at the den, Hamish nurses his fifth drink in a row. He kept beating himself up for keeping Kepler’s death from Vera. How can he bear to watch her all those times she was asking around for Kepler when he had known all along? He let her think of number of things when he could just simply put her mind at ease by telling her the truth. How can he doubt her loyalty to them? She had looked after them ever since Coventry and he still doubted her. He asked her to let him in when it was him who kept her at a distance from his world.

“Are you okay?” Lilith asked him.

The others had been busy cleaning up after Randall. They are making sure the Adeptis are not going to find any trace of him or Greybeard in the parking lot where he abducted Kepler.

“I should have told her the truth when I had the chance. She had asked for my opinion, you know. When she was worrying about Maddox, she asked if I was Kepler, where would I go and why would I leave a child alone in a parking lot. I looked at her face and told her ‘I don’t know. Perhaps, she decided to go on vacation, got tired of the kid’. I lied straight to her face when she’s honestly asking for my help. Do you know how hard it was for me to get her to be open to me like that? I wasted it all. I broke her trust and I don’t know how I will be able to repair it”, he answered.

So much really had happened since she was gone and one of those is Hamish falling for Vera Stone. She never liked the Grand Magus but she admired her leadership and her strength even though she does not like admitting that. The Grand Magus has gone out of her way with them and she can see that.

“You chose Randall. You chose your pack. She surely would see that”, she said.

“…and look what good it has done. We are on the brink of being hunted down by Adeptis because I doubted Vera. She said it was too late to devise anything now and if I had told her sooner, she could have thought of something. She would have covered for Randall and I doubted her”, he argued and resumed drinking.

At the porch outside, Alyssa and Jack sat side by side. She has told him that it was her fault Vera found out about Kepler. She thought she knew about it considering Vera is with Hamish.

“So, the Grand Magus broke up with Hamish”, she concluded.

“Apparently so…he did not say anything but he’s been drinking since he got here so yeah”, he confirmed.

“I am sorry, Jack. I did not know”, she apologized again.

“No, it was not your fault. It was ours. We kept it from her. I need to think how we can make it up to her”, he replied.


	6. Frame Up

Bitsy was never the most reliable person Vera has ever known but she had her moments. She was like a sister she never had. Despite the rivalry, Bitsy had been there for her during boy problems or when she simply did not want to be alone for lunch. They’ve known each other for so long and despite her poor background, Bitsy looked pass that and saw her for she is. They shared fashion tips, recipes, sleepover, even family problems. It would be cruel of her if she will say her death does not affect her because it does. Despite her shallow façade, Kepler cares for the Order. She had no responsibility to take Maddox in when Edward died but she did because she could not bear the child to be sent elsewhere even though she’s not fond of kids. Vera would have taken care of Maddox herself but she’s a walking bull’s eye right now. It wouldn’t be safe for him to be under her roof at the moment.

She was able to repair her house after being invaded by Salvador and Alyssa. She put enchantment all over the place to prevent another intrusion and to keep herself safe. It felt empty though. For months, Hamish had spent so much time with her in her home. He was being protective and she opposed at first with him coddling her and treating her like a porcelain doll but soon enough, she got used to him being around. He cooked for her, made her drinks, and made love to her at night. He looked after her and kept her safe when she lost her magic. He listened to her rants and made her feel safe and at ease despite everything. He lowered her walls and for the first time, she felt like she found someone she can fully trusts but it bite her in the ass. She did not expect that kind of betrayal to come from him. She thought the others would be capable of doing that but not Hamish, not after everything they shared together, not after she let him in.

Her wall mirror suddenly cracked which snapped her out of her thoughts. Her finger traced the cracks on it. Bottling up her emotions is beginning to cause problem for her. It’s already affecting her magic and it ruined her mirror.

The next day, Jack Morton is already in her office when she arrived. She considered casting a spell on him but she chose to take the high road and ignored him.

“Can we talk?” he asked.

“We’re done talking, Mr. Morton”, she answered and started working.

“Vera, please…I know we messed up and we should have told you. We’re just not sure how you will react to it. We’re trying to protect Randall. He made a grave mistake but I know you understand why he did it”, he said.

She sighed and put her pen down.

“Kepler was not just Head of the Gnostic Council. She also happened to be the guardian of your half-brother. I was forced to send Maddox to Brazil because I can’t take him in because of the threat to my life. Aside from that, Kepler and I had known each other before you were even born. Putting all of that aside, I was willing to cover up for Mr. Carpio if it will save your lives but you did not give me the chance to do that. On top of that, you went behind my back with Ms. Drake and Mr. Duke lied to my face. My leniency towards you and your pack is long but it’s not unlimited”, she said.

He can see the toll it’s taking on her. She’s composed most of the time but not today. She looked paler than usual and she sounds tired. It is also obvious how much she’s restraining herself from doing something reckless.

“Tell me how I can fix this. Tell me what to do to make it up to you”, he proposed.

It made her smiled and then chuckled.

“Oh, Mr. Morton…I was told once that trust is like a mirror. Once it’s broken, you can try and fix it, glue it together, but you can still see the crack on its reflection”, she muttered.

“Please, at least let me try. Let me make it up to you”, he pleaded.

Why does he have to be her favorite? It cost her a lot ever since he was accepted to Belgrave.

“Clean up the mess your friend created. Don’t give any reason to Adepti that will make them suspect you. That should make our lives easier. If you got through this alive, then, we’ll talk about how we’re going forward with this…alliance”, she said.

He’s not sure how they’re going to do that but he knows if the Council found out it was them who’s responsible for Kepler’s death, Vera will also be held accountable for recruiting them into the folds. It will all come back to her.

“Yes, Grand Magus”, he agreed and turned around.

“Mr. Morton”, she stopped him. Jack turned around to see her face conflicted. “The Adeptis had been selected. They will arrive here tomorrow. Better start devising a plan now”, she informed him.

It warms his heart to learn she still cares even though she got hurt by their actions. It also makes him feel incredibly guilty. They really messed up with her and he regrets taking her for granted. She saved his life when the Sons of Prometheus wanted him dead when he had killed one of theirs. She endangered her position as Grand Magus when she could just let him die and get rid of him.

“Thank you, Grand Magus”, he replied and left.

\------------------------------

“She said that?” Lilith asked in disbelief.

Vera’s tipped about the Adeptis arrival gave them an advantage to prepare before it all starts. They started pitching in ideas while Gabrielle was busy with her phone. Hamish felt a strand of hope that he may be able to make it up to Vera. He just needs to figure out how. 

“The parking lot is cleared. There’s nothing there that they can trace back to us”, Randall said.

“That’s good. Now, we can just stage a crime scene for Kepler’s body. We can’t just let her disappear forever or they will not stop looking”, Gabrielle finally joined in.

They all took that into consideration and realized she’s right.

“What’s your plan?” Jack asked their newest addition to the pack.

“We’re at war with Praxis, right? They’ve been targeting us and the Grand Magus. Why don’t we make it look like they’re the ones responsible for Kepler’s death so the Adeptis will turn their attention to them and not us? It will not only absolve us from her death but it will also help the Grand Magus if the Adeptis can take care of the Praxis for her”, she answered.

“That is actually not a bad idea”, Lilith muttered.

“Alright…eruption is not an option anymore since it was closed. We can create some sort of altar for a ritual so we can make it look like the Praxis used her for sacrifice”, Jack suggested.

“We’re going to need Nicole for this. We can only assist but we have to be careful not to leave any trace. The Adeptis have to smell Praxis and not us wolves”, Hamish added.

“The man who tried to kill Grand Magus. We stashed his body. We can plant him there. Casualty of a dangerous spell gone wrong”, Randall pitched in.

Once the plan is polished, they began working. They set out a staged ritual spot near Foley’s hideout and then brought Kepler’s body along with the member of the Praxis. Nicole removed any trace of werewolf around and replicated the essence of the man from Praxis all over to create a sense of multiple members present at the place. Then, they left.

When the morning came, Vera welcomed the Adeptis. Some of them she knew back then and the others only by reputation. The inquiries ended up quickly and then she sent them to start searching for Kepler. While working inside her office, her head began throbbing again. The headaches had not stopped even after cutting the connection between Lilith and the Demon Realm. Of course, she already knew why that is. She’s only wishing that the impending doom will happen not soon enough. She still needs to prepare, and they got other problems to worry about like Praxis. 

It took a full day before the Adeptis returned to her office with a news. Kepler has been found dead along with a tourist practitioner on an abandoned building which belonged to Cameron Foley. They unanimously concluded that Kepler was abducted to be offered as a sacrifice by Praxis to declare war against the Order. They traced essences of other members on the premises which solidified their decision. They quickly left to report back to the Council. 

“Vera”, Hamish called when he went to her office.

Too soon, she thought. She’s not ready to talk to him yet but he’s there. There’s no getting rid of him, not when he’s determined.

“Mr. Duke, I thought I was clear that none of you go to this temple unless I say so but then again, I should know by now that werewolves don’t know how to follow simple instructions like that”, she stated.

“Listen, we’re on the clear. The Adeptis thought it was the Praxis. We made it looked like they got to Kepler”, he informed her.

His voice is so full of hope and desperation. She can also tell he’s a bit weary. They both are.

“I know”, she muttered.

“The Adeptis reported to you, of course”, he realized.

“They do but that’s not how I knew what you did”, he looked at her, completely puzzled. “I know because it was my idea to stage a ritual setting which will implicate Praxis. You don’t honestly think Ms. Dupres will be able to come up with that plan on a whim. She’s brilliant but not that brilliant and quick”, she revealed.

Hamish blinked a few times before he fully absorbed what she just said. He seemed to remember Gabrielle’s face buried on her phone while they’re planning about how to navigate their way out of their mess. She was texting with Vera all along.

“You helped us”, he whispered.

“I know it’s beyond your expectation but it will make me look as bad as you if they found out you’re responsible. Besides, you’re all going to die if I let you do things on your own”, she expressed casually.

He knows how to read between her words by now. She did it because she cares for them. She may not say it out loud but her actions speak for her.

“I’m sorry, Vera”, he blurted out.

Her eyes found his. She is aware how hard it is for him to lower his pride and apologize. It’s the proud wolf in him. For him to say he is sorry takes a lot more than just uttering those words.

“I know you are”, she said.

“I can’t do this, existing without you, Vera. I miss you”, he confessed.

Alcohol as company is not enough. He misses putting his arms around her. He misses listening to her stories and random talk at night. He misses watching her work. He misses making drinks for her. He misses cooking for her. He misses taking care of her. He misses all of her.

“I don’t know if we can be the same again, Hamish”, she calls him again by his first name, dropping the wall for a moment. “I let you in. I put my trust in you and you lied to me. That’s not easy to come back from”, she responded.

Trusting anyone is difficult for her and the one instance she did, it went down the drain.

“Give me a chance to earn your trust back”, he decided.

“It might take you a lifetime”, she said.

“I don’t care. I am going to work for it. Let me work for it. I am going to prove myself to you. I am going to prove to you that I am not going to hurt you again, that I am worthy of your trust…please”, he pleaded.

She not only heard him say sorry, she also heard him say please. He must be really desperate. A part of her wanted to just give in and forgive him but she’s been burnt way too many times. She cannot help it if her defense mechanism is shutting people out.

“Fine. I don’t think I can stop you anyway”, she agreed.

“You will not regret this”, he expressed with a hopeful expression on his face.

“Better not make promises, Mr. Duke”, she warned.

“I don’t intend to break them”, he replied.

“Well, guess you can start by finding me Kelvin Trenton”, she then said.


	7. Praxis

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, with the series, i was kind of disappointed that the parley between Salvador and Vera did not result in a magic match since Salvador seemed to be very skillful with magic despite having no training and Vera is powerful and unrestricted with magic (insert Fors Factoram) so i made this happen instead. Of course, Vera is all powerful in here because she is awesome and the queen and she should be.
> 
> Also, i worked on getting Alyssa back on the team, kind of put her in the middle and make her choose between the Order and Praxis. Well, her choice now will always be Jack since he brought her back and all and she loves him.

Kelvin Trenton was not that hard to find especially for a wolf. It only took Hamish two days to find his location and get an item that belonged to him. Vera instructed him to do that. For what reason? He does not know. All he cares about is earning her trust back. He messed up bad and he needs to make it up to her. Jack had expressed to her Alyssa’ concern about what Vera is planning for the Praxis. She reiterated that not all of them are bad and after Vera but he found it hard to believe after he found their hideout. Vera’s face is basically framed on a board in their main hall. They’re studying her along with the rest of the Hermetic Order of the Blue Rose but she is their main target. Cutting off the head of the snake is what they want.

“Good work, Mr. Duke”, Vera complimented him when he handed Kelvin Trenton’s tie.

The rest of the Knights have been present in her office this time. They have been securing the temple from any threat from Praxis right after Hamish discovered their intention to attack.

“Now what?” Jack asked.

It’s more of a question from Alyssa than him. She wants to know whether Vera is planning a genocide or not.

“Now, Mr. Morton, we arrange a meeting”, she answered and placed the tie flat on her desk. “Libera dominus meus ad suos”, she casted and the tie gradually had been obliterated.

It worried Hamish a little that Vera has been using magic more often now without doing sacrifice. She used to do it by the book even though she does not need to but now, she stopped doing that. 

“What was that?” Randall asked.

“I sent them a message, more like an invitation for a meeting. It’s time for me to meet Kelvin Trenton”, she answered.

\-------------------------------

Hamish is worried about the said meeting. Praxis replied and accepted Vera’s invitation but it will be done at their hideout. They have the homefield advantage. He tried explaining that to Vera but she just assured him that she knows what she’s doing. The Kepler case had been closed as she assured the Council she will bring justice to her death by dealing with the Praxis. He has no idea how she is going to do that. Jack has been bugging him about that too because Alyssa has been bugging him about Vera’s plans. As solution, Vera asked for Alyssa to join them.

On the day of the meeting, everyone is tensed. All the Knights came with Vera together with Alyssa. It surprised other members of Praxis to see her with the Hermetic Order of Blue Rose. She was their former acting leader after Salvador died. To them, it felt like betrayal. Perhaps, it’s why Vera had asked her to come along. Is it her punishment or theirs? No one knows. Kelvin Trenton came forward in his expensive suit and smug smirk. He eyed Vera from head to toe and it angered Hamish. It does not seem to faze Vera at all. She looks incredibly calm.

“Grand Magus, finally we meet”, Kelvin greeted.

“It’s long overdue”, Vera replied.

“Well, I would like to apologize for making you travel all this way but after what happened with your parley with Salvador Grant, I am merely taking precaution”, he explained.

“Of course, attempting a murder-suicide was such a lousy plan which cost her, her life. You have all the right to take precaution. By the way, nice touch on that man you sent at the temple”, she expressed.

Kelvin’s expression hardened. It was a failed attempt on both Salvador and the man he sent. So far, they’ve been nothing but failures and Vera rubbed it on his face.

“I assume you’re here for negotiation, a compromise”, he said.

Vera chuckled mockingly.

“You attempted to assassinate me, killed a bunch of my students on campus, robbed me of my inventory and you assumed I am one to initiate negotiation to compromise?” the man is now furious. “I only invited you to meet so you can tell me what you want and to stop you from making a fool out of yourself with your petty attempts. It’s just pathetic even for a wannabe practitioner”, she said.

“Petty? Wannabe? What we want is what we always wanted, freedom. You’re not the only ones entitled to magic. It’s not yours to keep. You keep hoarding it like it’s your birth right but it’s not! We deserve it as much as you do! We want the Fors Factoram”, he declared.

It’s nothing new from what Vera had expected. They always wanted the same thing. They wanted power like everybody else. Idiots. They don’t care about the cost. That’s why some of them died trying to learn dangerous spells because they don’t care. Their desire to be powerful tops the safety of their lives.

“The answer is no”, she replied with finality.

“Well then, I guess there’s nothing more to talk about”, Kelvin breathed out.

The Knights immediately sensed danger. They demanded to meet on their grounds so they can set up a trap. Vera refused to meet their demands because she knows either way, they will kill them. That’s why they agreed to the meeting. In fact, she counted on that fact. The Knights growled as the members of Praxis appeared from hiding. They have grown in numbers and there’s no doubt that in a few months, weeks even, they can cause another Tartarus eruption due to their bad magic.

“You’re sentencing your people to death”, Vera warned him.

It is a warning. She is giving him a way out before he forces her hand though she already knows he’s not backing out. It will not look good on him as a leader.

“It’s your people who will die today”, he replied.

The Knights are ready to wolf out at any moment. They’re just waiting for Vera to give the signal. Few of his members launched an attack but she’s quicker.

“Obice praesidium”, she casted and the spell just bounced and dissipated. It surprised them how easy it was for her to do that. “I am sure you can handle those lurching back in the woods?” she turned to her wolves.

It was all they needed. Eager to fight and end the Praxis, the Knights wolfed out.

Alyssa caught Jack’s hand before he transformed.

“Are you going to kill them?” she asked him.

“Do you want us to get killed by them?” he asked her back.

They cannot keep playing tug of war. She has to make up her mind which side she wants to be in.

“Stay alive”, she answered and let him go.

Jack then joined others, leaving Vera and Alyssa in the clearing alone with a bunch of Praxis and Kelvin Trenton.

“Ms. Drake, this is the part where you choose who you will fight. You got two choices: you stay here with me and fight them or you join them and fight me”, Vera said.

Alyssa looked incredibly conflicted. She’s regretting coming with Jack when he offered. If she doesn’t join the Praxis, they will think she betrayed them and kill her. If she joins them, her amnesty is done. Jack will be upset for her another betrayal and the Order and the Knights are coming for her throat.

“Stay and fight”, she chose.

“Glad to know you can still use your brain, Ms. Drake”, Vera commented and turned back to Kelvin. “Are we going to do this or what?” she challenged.

Kelvin took out his knife and sliced his palm and started casting spells her way. Alyssa began fighting the other members of the Praxis. Both of them can hold on very well. After all, they are both accomplished practitioner of the Order. Vera stopped uttering Latin and just use magic freely. The others began noticing her magic.

“You…you performed Fors Factoram and yet you deny us that chance!” Kelvin exclaimed furiously.

“Well, I already paid the price for it so you can call me a special case”, she teased and began advancing.

Alyssa only used mild spells that will only knock the members out but not kill them and once she’s through with their left side, she began noticing the Grand Magus is doing things differently. Vera is no fighting Kelvin and five more Praxis members. One of them managed to hit her and she flew backwards but still landed on her one foot and knee just in time the Knights came back to see it happened. Hamish/Tundra growled in anger and was about to launch on them but Vera had stopped him when she raised her hand.

She wiped the blood from her lips and got back on her feet. Her head is still throbbing from her now daily dose of headache but her adrenaline is running high and she’s been using magic without sacrifice consecutively that she’s immensely hyped.

“Alright…enough foreplay. I gave you chance to walk away but you’re all too stubborn to take hint. Let’s put an end to this”, she announced.

Still feeling the little sense of victory by managing to actually land a spell on the Grand Magus, Kelvin brushed off what she just said.

“It will only end in your death, Grand Magus”, he replied.

Vera went still and quiet. It is a sunny day but the clouds suddenly made an appearance and covered the sun. The wind started blowing harder than usual like a storm is just about to come. She opened her arms and the weather got worse. It took a while before the Knights adjusted to the loud ringing in their ears. She is using way too much magic for their senses and it’s beginning to hurt their highly sensitive eardrums.

“You ever wondered what you can do with magic without sacrifice?” her undereye gradually darkening, “let it be the last thing you’ll see…”

“Vita alia ascita, ergo mors tua”, she casted and just like that, every member of Praxis started choking and coughing blood.

Horror reflected onto the face of everyone. The Knights had to shift back to their human form to spare themselves from hearing the ringing. Praxis dropped to their knees, struggling to remain alive.

“Stop! You’re killing them!” Alyssa exclaimed to Vera.

She almost gasped when she saw the Grand Magus. If Rogwan claimed to be an Emperor of Fear, she will surely give him run for his money because she terrifies her more than that demon.

“That’s the idea, Ms. Drake”, Vera muttered and then clenched her fists.

Everyone on the Praxis’ side dropped dead. The wind stopped blowing harshly. The sky cleared. Bodies on the ground is revealed. Vera dropped to her knees from exhaustion. Her headaches worsen. Hamish put on his robe quickly and went to her side. She’s extremely pale. The spell took a lot of her strength.

“I am taking her back to the temple”, he said to the others.

“Right. We’ll catch up with you”, Jack was the only one who was able to respond.

As Hamish literally carried Vera away from the scene, the others took in the sight in front of them. Dead people, it’s a ground filled with dead people. Alyssa and Jack have seen this kind of sight before back in the compound of the Sons of Prometheus when Praxis killed everyone of them except for Orbin and Xavier who were escorting them on their way out.

“What the hell?” Gabrielle muttered in fear.

“That’s literally what this is”, Randall commented.

“Is she really this powerful or this is what Fors Factoram can do to a practitioner?” Lilith asked.

Alyssa composed herself. She cannot let her emotions get in the way again.

“Fors Factoram allowed you to use magic without sacrifices. Therefore, opens you to endless possibilities of magic and necromancy but that’s not this. What I saw earlier…” her voice cracked and everyone noticed. “…I don’t know how to describe it. Vera was overflowing with power inside her like a dam spilling over because it’s already full. That’s not Fors Factoram’s effect”, she answered.

They all stared at the bodies again and swallowed the lumps on their throats.

“So, what does that make our Grand Magus?” Gabrielle asked.

“I guess there’s more to that story in the Demon Realm than we know”, Jack answered.


	8. Power Dam

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i just got this idea when i woke up this morning. I must have dreamed it or something. Anyway, thank you for the comments. I really appreciate it and a good boost to the drive of writing more chapters so keep them coming. Everything is welcome!

Hamish took Vera back at the temple so he can tend to her needs and take care of her. She looked as white as a paper even with her red lipstick. She’s been drifting in and out of consciousness throughout the drive back. When he sets her down the couch in her office, she came to but still weak to move. He got her a glass of water to keep her hydrated and then he dampened a piece of cloth and dabbed it on her forehead.

“I think I may need something a little bit stronger than water”, she muttered in a hoarse voice.

“…not right now. You need to be hydrated. You are so pale, the unhealthy kind of pale”, he objected.

If she’s on her hundred percent condition, she would have protested to that but she’s too tired to care. She just wants to lay down and have a massage. A day in the spa sounds actually nice to her right now.

“I can hear your questions inside your brain so might as well ask them”, she sighed out loud.

Hamish wondered if that’s actually from a spell or she’s just good at reading him at this point.

“What happened back there?” is his first question.

“You were there. You know what happened”, she deflected quickly.

“I know what I saw but I don’t know what to make of it”, he expressed.

“Praxis wanted the same thing Salvador and Ms. Drake have always wanted. I can’t give it to them and they retaliated”, she narrated.

He took the glass of water from her hand and set it on her desk.

“Sure. That’s one way to do it. I just got this feeling that you already know that’s what they want, and you still initiated the talk and deliberately pissed Kelvin Trenton off. You were counting that they set a trap for you”, he theorized.

She has always admired his intelligence. It’s a wonder why he got stuck with being a TA rather than taking the teaching profession himself. He would have made a great professor.

“I anticipated, yes. None of them actually cared about making the world a better place. They kept blabbering about equality and freedom when all they want with magic, unrestricted magic, is power. They want to be powerful to do whatever the hell they pleased. I will not be the one to hand it to them and even if we walk away earlier without violence, they will do everything in their power to get it and kill me. It will never end”, she explained.

“…but that’s not really the reason why you did it”, he presumed.

If she knows him well, he does too. She just does not do things like that without a good reason. Vera has hid her power, her unrestricted power, from everyone for so long only to show it to her disciples like that. She must have a very good reason.

“The Council wanted to resolve the death of Kepler. Since they thought it’s the Praxis’ fault, they wanted it to be taken care of”, she revealed.

The others had asked before what would become of Praxis after they pinned Kepler’s death on them. The Adeptis left after coming to that conclusion to report back to the Council and that was it. 

“They asked you to kill Praxis?” he asked.

“They did not ask”, she sat right up and took a moment to adjust her vision, “It is my duty as Grand Magus to bestow verdict to whoever violated the law of the Hermetic Order of the Blue Rose. The Praxis’ crime, as far as the Council is concerned, was sacrificing the Head of the Gnostic Council for their ritual which resulted to her death. That is a grave offense and punishable by death and so I did what must be done in order to play my role and eliminate the threat to your lives”, she answered.

The Praxis’ fate was sealed the moment he found their location. It was the reason why Vera had asked him to locate them for her. It was the reason why she initiated the meeting. She wanted them all in one place so it would be easier for her to end it. It’s part of her plan when she relayed the way to cover up their mess to Gabrielle. 

Vera would have gone easy on them if they chose to walk away, if they yielded or at least surrendered. Kelvin Trenton was more like Salvador and Alyssa. They’re not ones to bow down even if odds are against them. Her first plan was to erase their memories, made them forget about magic and Praxis. It was going to be a modified version than the one they always use, a stronger version but she would not be able to do that because they were attacking. So, she went with what the Council wants. A complete genocide.

“I don’t know how to thank you for saving us for god knows how many times now”, he muttered.

“Honesty and transparency would be enough. I don’t like being lied to my face especially by you”, she said.

“I swore on my life, I will never lie to you ever again”, he promised.

They were interrupted by the loud ringing and the pain in her head. They both groaned in pain but Hamish was quick to recover as he’s used to his magic alarm. Vera clutched her hands onto the couch as she tries to go over the pain but it’s way too painful now than usual.

“I’m going to get help”, she heard Hamish say and then she’s all alone.

‘great job out there, witch. You truly have come so far from when we met’

“Shut up”, she whispered.

‘how does it feel to be able to take lives as easy as that?’

“I said shut up”, she repeated.

‘I bet it felt good. I know it does. I used to do that all the time. Kill here. Kill there. Kill everywhere’

“Shut up! Shut up! Shut up!” she exclaimed.

“Vera—”

A wave of energy came out of her and knocked everything around her including Hamish at the door. It threw him all the way into the ritual table. It’s just about the time the others arrived and saw Hamish hit the table.

“Hamish!” Lilith exclaimed and went to his side.

He is groaning and holding the back of his head. Lilith used her magic to heal the cut on his head and ease his bruises. Jack and Alyssa went to check on Vera inside the office. She is now back on her feet. Her office is a mess.

“Vera”, Jack called.

She looked at them with confused expression on her face. A familiar marking is now shown on her face.

“I think it would be best if you all leave the temple right now, Mr. Morton”, she muttered.

Her hands are glowing and the objects in her office are vibrating.

“Tell us what to do. We can help”, he said.

“You’ve done enough, Mr. Morton. Just go. I don’t know how much longer I can hold this and you don’t want to be in here when I lost it”, she turned to them when they did not move. “Go!” she yelled.

Alyssa grabbed Jack’s hand and pulled him out of the room. They reached the others outside.

“We have to go now!” Alyssa shouted.

They wanted to ask why but the urgency in her voice registered in Lilith so she forced Hamish out and the others followed.

Vera was left alone in the temple, struggling to control her powers. Once she’s sure there’s no one else inside, she finally let go and a loud explosion was heard outside of the building.

“Vera”, Hamish muttered.

Everyone followed him back inside the temple as he rushed to get to her. The damage is evident inside the temple but Alyssa helped in restoring everything as they navigated the temple filled with debris. It took less than five minutes for Alyssa, Lilith, and Gabrielle to restore everything. Hamish ran to Vera’s office who looked like a crater of a fallen meteor. At the center of it is Vera lying unconsciously on the floor.

“Hey, Vera…come on, open your eyes. Vera…” he said trying to wake her up but she’s not opening her eyes.

It was only then he noticed the marking on her face. It’s almost the same one Lilith had when they got her back from Demon Realm but different. Her skin is so cold like she stepped out of an air-conditioned room. Through his sensitive hearing, he can hear her heart still beating but weak. She is alive but she felt dead. Jack came in and saw what has become of her office.

“Hamish, Gabrielle had set up a nice sofa for her outside. Alyssa and Lilith can work on restoring her office”, he informed him.

Hamish only nodded and carried Vera into his arms and brought her outside where a sofa Gabrielle magic out of thin air is waiting for her. Alyssa and Lilith took a lot longer to restore the office as the damage was greater than the rest of the temple. After they’re done, they tried to use healing spell on her to get her strength back. Her skin got pink a little and she felt warmer than earlier. It’s a good sign.

“Is she a demon now? How come she has that mark?” Lilith asked.

“She’s not a demon. She’s never been there”, Gabrielle retorted.

“…but she encountered one”, Alyssa interjected.

Heads turned to her which made her conscious.

“If you’re going to say something, please do finish”, Hamish remarked with grave tone.

“All I’m saying is that she dealt with an Emperor demon before. As a matter of fact, she stopped him from killing everyone, right? How did she did it? How did she stop him from enacting his plan?” she asked them.

They took time to recall the story.

“She suppressed Marcus’ ability to inflict death”, Hamish answered.

“Is that even possible?” Randall asked.

Alyssa snapped her fingers.

“That’s the thing. It depends on the spell she used back then. Marcus is an emperor demon which means his power to inflict death is bound to his true nature. He did not go through training to perfect it. He was just born with it. If Vera managed to suppress it completely that he was left unable to inflict death, it would take so much than just suppressing spell. That spell can only suppress perhaps, half of his inborn power. The rest of that power, she must have done something else”, Alyssa explained.

“What then? Marcus failed to cause death directly until he was forced back to hell. What did the Grand Magus do to do that to him?” Gabrielle asked again.

There are numbers of spells that she could have accessed due to the fact that she performed Fors Factoram. Her options were limitless.

“She took it”, Jack answered.

“What are you talking about?” Hamish asked.

“Look at her. She bears the markings on her face and it’s not the same one Zecchia got or Lilith used to have. Rogwan’s kind of looked the same but not quite either. We all saw how she killed everyone in that clearing earlier. She did effortlessly and with that amount of power? That’s not something a simple practitioner has Fors Factoram or not. The only way she could have suppressed Marcus’ power is by taking a portion of it from him so the spell would work. She took it from him and put it in herself hoping that when Fors Factoram claims her life, that power to inflict death will die with her and that will impale Marcus forever, having a broken power and all even if he managed to break the suppressing spell”, Jack answered.

“…only she did not die because Marcus saved her life to punish her by causing the death of her daughter. She carried a portion of his power in her all these years”, Hamish sighed and rubbed his hair, “It must have been the reason why she kept doing sacrifices when casting spells even though she does not have to. She’s controlling the power in her”, he concluded.

Eyes turned to the unconscious Vera.

“…until today when she had used so much amount of magic without sacrifice that she also lost control of that power in her…like water inside the dam that’s long overdue from spilling. It completely broke”, Jack followed up.

“The dam in her just broke”, Alyssa muttered.


	9. Right Before...

By the time Vera came to, everything is back to normal inside the temple. She was certain that her outburst destroyed everything. She felt everything turned to crumble before she passed out but now, things are back to the way they were. Something is different though. For one, she’s not in her office. She’s outside at the ritual room on a sofa she doesn’t recognize. She can hear voices coming from her office and it intrigued her. Grasping her strength, she got on her feet and slowly walked towards her office as quiet as possible.

“Why are we trying to get Marcus’ power out of the Grand Magus? If she has that then we won’t have another Praxis problem on our hand. No one will be ever to touch the Hermetic Order of the Blue Rose ever again”, she heard Gabrielle asked.

She stiffened at the fact they know what she did years ago to stop Marcus. It was a swift decision, a desperate one on her part. The Grand Magus at the time, her mentor, could not stop Marcus and because he lived by the rules and laws of magic, he chose not to do the Fors Factoram to allow him the power to use the spell to stop the demon and so she did it. She accepted the fact that once it’s all over, she may never be with her daughter and had made her mentor to promise to take care of her child for her when she died. Once stripped of all restrictions, she found out that killing Marcus would have been impossible given the amount of lives he already claimed during his time on earth. The only way she could stop him was suppressing his ability to inflict death, but the spell wouldn’t take on his power. She must lessen it a bit and so she took a portion of that and casted the spell.

Since then, she had guarded herself from the temptation of succumbing to the enticing power sitting in her. She’s not only a practitioner who can use magic freely, she also has a power of an emperor demon in her. Every incantation, every ritual she performed, she did it by the book. She did not allow herself to be consumed by power, greed, and ambition. It’s also one of the reasons why she refused nominations for any positions higher than Temple Magus. She severed herself from anything that will tempt her to go sideways and for years, it worked. 

When Alyssa took her magic, she took her restraints along with it. Though she couldn’t access magic, she could still feel Marcus’ power in her but she did her best not to think about it much. It was tempting to resort to it not knowing if she’ll ever get her magic back but she succeeded in resisting. Now she knows that what Alyssa did cause a lot more than her losing her magic temporarily. It removed her wall between the power in her and Marcus. With Lilith being back on earth bearing the demon’s mark on her face, it served as conduit for Marcus and he was able to reach her because he could feel his power in her.

“Do you want another explosion like earlier again? We’re lucky it happened here at the temple and no one’s here at the time. What if it happens outside on campus? Can you imagine what it would do?” Randall asked her back.

Vera decided to make her presence known.

“It won’t happen again”, all heads turned on her like they’ve seen a ghost, “As you can see, it’s already written on my face. You need to stop trashing my office because you will not find anything in there that can take this out of me”, she interrupted.

They returned the books back to shelves and cleaned up her desk. Hamish is looking at her warily. Vera sighed and put a spell on her face that hid the mark on her face.

“Wow, why didn’t I use that when I got that on me?” Lilith muttered.

“How are you feeling?” Jack asked her.

“Stable, Mr. Morton. I know that’s what you’re concern about. I apologize for the trouble I caused earlier but I got it under control now. It has been so long since I used real magic, I forgot how to pull it back”, she answered.

Hamish is staying quiet. He has been holding his breath ever since they found out what Vera has done years ago to protect the humanity. He thought the cost she paid for it was her daughter’s life but it turned out, it costs more. She was so sure she was going to die that she did not think of the repercussion of taking Marcus’ power and she had carried the burden of having so much power inside her which she cannot use. It made her shut everyone out and deprived herself of any possible human connection, fearing that it will lower her guard down that may result into a catastrophe like what happened earlier. She spent years suffering alone from grief, guilt, regret, and god knows what else.

“It’s over now, right? Lilith’s connection to the Demon Realm is gone which means Marcus threat is gone too. The Council is off our back with Kepler and we took care of Praxis. Everything should go back to normal now, right?” Gabrielle asked.

Hamish turned to look at her to gauge her reaction. He saw nothing good. 

“It might take a few more days for that if we get lucky”, she answered.

Everyone stiffened up. 

“What more is there?” it was Randall’s turn to follow up.

“Marcus is coming here”, it is all it takes for Hamish to almost wolf out, “Lilith’s connection to the Demon Realm was just a channel for him to know what’s happening here on this realm. It would take a strong incantation or ritual to give him the small crack he needs to get through, something that has thrown off the balance between life and death and it destabilize the wall between hell and earth”, Vera answered directing the last part on Jack.

He got what she meant fast enough.

“Blood and limbs were not enough for the Vade Maecum…” he muttered.

Alyssa looked alarmed.

“The resurrection spell that brought Alyssa back to life. Jack’s sacrifice was not enough so the spell caused an eruption but it did not lead to a Tartarus one. It caused a rift between the Demon Realm and earth”, Lilith concluded.

Vera did not say a thing which confirmed it all. She did warn Jack about it and she knew it’s bound to happen once he told her about Alyssa being alive. She just hoped it wouldn’t come to that but after days of suffering from tremendous headaches, her power going haywire, and Marcus’ voice that won’t shut up inside her brain, it is going to happen without a doubt.

“When is he coming?” Alyssa asked, breaking her silence.

“Soon. Could be next week, in a couple of days, tomorrow…he’s unpredictable that way”, she answered and it scared all of them, “in the meantime, I want you all to stay away from the temple. I am suspending any activities and duties of all disciples for a couple of days. Marcus wants me so I must do this alone”, she then said.

“We’re not going to leave you”, she looked surprised by Randall’s reaction. “Listen, I know I’ve been a pain in your ass and I caused one hell of a problem for you and everyone. Despite all that, you protected me when you don’t have to so I am not going to hide while you face a demon”, he resisted.

“I’m not hiding either. I serve the Order and you Grand Magus. On top of that, I am also a Knight which means we fight bad magic, demon or not”, Gabrielle seconded.

“Oh, me too. I’ve been to hell. I’m not scared of another demon”, Lilith added.

“We’re not going anywhere either, Vera. We caused this. We’re not leaving you”, Jack said with Alyssa nodding along.

She sighed deeply and pursed her lips.

“Why do I inducted stubborn disciples who happened to be werewolves?” she muttered under her breath which left a smirk on their faces. “Fine. Stay at your own risk but please get out of my office. It’s beginning to smell like dogs”, she dismissed them.

That leaves a very quiet Hamish alone with her. He closed the door for her and suddenly the atmosphere in the room changed into something serious.

“Well, spill it out”, she encouraged.

“You did not tell me about having demon’s power”, he muttered.

“I did not recall you asking and besides, it’s not something that comes up during conversations or pillow talk”, she replied.

He raced her to the bottle of bourbon beside her desk and poured her a drink before she could do it herself.

“I thought I was going to lose you”, she dropped her cold exterior to look at him, “You were here and cold as ice. I could hear your heart but you weren’t moving. They healed you and all but you’re still unconscious. I know how much you hate being compared to my dead girlfriend but that moment, I thought it’s going to end exactly the same…you dying and me failing to protect you”, he confessed with his eyes buried at her drink.

She ran her hand on his arm then his shoulder. He took his gaze away from her glass to look back at her eyes.

“I’m sorry for scaring you”, she apologized.

“I was not scared, Vera. I am scared now because a demon is coming to kill you and I am not sure if I am strong enough to stop him”, he clarified.

It’s been a long while since someone has genuinely cared for her and wanted to protect her. The last person who had been like that for her was her mentor who took her in and treated her like his own daughter. Now, there’s Hamish and she’s not sure what she has done during the time in between to deserve someone like him.

“I don’t want you to protect me, Hamish, not from Marcus. What I want is for you to be far away from here as possible when he comes”, she requested.

He shook his head right away.

“…not gonna happen, Vera”, he declined.

“I am not going to lose another person I care about to Marcus”, she explained.

“…and I am not going to run away knowing your life is in danger. I am sorry but I will do anything in my power to keep you safe”, he insisted.

She thought about casting a spell on him but that would be a betrayal and she demanded honesty from him. She is not going to do that to him.

“Hamish, I want you to understand. You are not just a practitioner of the Order or just a Knight. You are the leader of your pack. Those stubborn idiots out there are your responsibility and it’s your duty to keep them safe and right now, being here is not safe for everyone. I appreciate the concern and you wanting to protect me. I do. It’s been a while and I actually forgot what it feels like but I know I can protect myself but they can’t and you know that. It’s on you to make sure they’re going to be safe because it’s on me to worry about Marcus”, she explained.

She needs him to understand that she cannot think about defeating Marcus and worrying about all of them at once. If she failed to survive, Hamish is the next choice to be everyone’s leader and she cannot risk him endangering himself along with her.

“Can we stop talking like leaders right now and just be us? I understand the responsibility but I don’t think I can bring myself to leave you alone, Vera, and I don’t think you can make that choice either if the situation is reversed”, he said.

“I am capable of making difficult choices, Mr. Duke”, she snapped.

“You tell yourself that but you go out of your way to protect us when your responsibility is to the Order, Grand Magus”, he snapped back.

It is true. Every minute, she can feel Marcus getting closer. He may be already in this realm. Getting everyone out will be impossible and they’re making it hard for her to save their lives.

“Marcus has got enough time in hell to regain his strength. I may have a portion of his power but he got majority of it. He’s capable again to inflict death”, she informed him.

“We’re not Emperor of Death but we’re capable of inflicting death too”, he replied.

She smiled for the first time in a long time. His arrogance is palpable but it’s charming. He cupped her face and pressed his lips on hers so she would feel how much he needs her. This time she lets him without reminding him they’re at the temple. She needed it. When an invisible wave of magic hit Vera which made her flinched, she pulled away from him and the smile is gone.

“That capability will be put to test sooner than I thought. He’s here”, she muttered.


	10. Face Off

A portal appeared in the middle of the ritual room. Fear crept up fast in all of them despite expecting the company. They did not expect him to arrive so soon. Vera and Hamish joined them as Marcus stepped out of the portal. He’s wearing the same exact uniform like Rogwan but he looked more sinister, more experienced than the Emperor of Fear. 

“Wolves…interesting company of choice, witch”, he greeted when his eyes set upon Vera. “You did grow into a very fine woman. It’s a shame that I have to kill you so soon”, he added.

Hamish instinctively stepped in front of her as if to cover her from the demon who wants her dead.

“Don’t be so sure about that”, Jack responded.

Curiosity appeared in the demon’s eyes. something definitely changed since the last time he surfaced from his realm. Back then, Knights and the Order were sworn enemies and now the Knights are protecting the Grand Magus.

“This is going to be fun”, he muttered as the others wolfed out and started attacking him.

It is to no avail. Even Vera knows they’re hopeless against Marcus. He is just humoring them by allowing them to give their all but every attack, he deflected with such ease. Hamish is going to join them but she held him back. It will be a waste. Alyssa tried to help out with magic and though she’s a strong practitioner, she’s not strong enough.

“Alright…as much as I would like to keep this up, you’re all starting to look pathetic to me now so I’m going to kill you now”, Marcus declared.

His hand glowed in red and the Knights and Alyssa started groaning in pain. Vera pushed Hamish aside as her own hand glowed in the same color and stopped him. She heard them coughed and caught their breaths. It irritated the demon. He does not like being interrupted from killing others and the fact that she did it using his own power added to the spite.

“Pick your own size, Marcus. Don’t lower yourself fighting children”, she muttered.

The demon mark on her face reappeared and she did not bother covering it up.

“Shame…you would have looked so great as a demon. You could have reigned the Demon Realm with me but you already caused me too much humiliation to ever deserve my forgiveness”, he said.

“I don’t recall asking for forgiveness”, she snapped.

“You should have”, he snapped back and attacked.

Black and red lights collided in midair. It almost blinded them. Vera and Marcus struggled for control though Marcus proven to be powerful, Vera is holding her own but it’s taking much of her energy. The demon landed a blow on her and it brought her to her knees.

“So much power and yet you cannot defeat me! The problem with you is you cannot bring yourself to embrace the power. You are scared of it when it should be something you cherish! You don’t deserve it at all”, Marcus declared.

“Then why don’t you take it back?” she challenged.

“Gladly”, he accepted with a smirk and directed his hands towards her and extracted his stolen power from her body.

Vera screamed in pain. It’s like a part of her soul is being ripped away from her. She had his power in her for so long that taking it out of her body felt like being stabbed multiple times all over. Hamish tried to get to her but something blocked him and he flew backwards making him growl in anger. Once it’s over, Vera gasped for air. She felt wave of relief washed through her. It felt refreshing. She felt lighter.

“Now, that’s better. I feel whole again”, Marcus expressed.

He launched attack after attack on Vera which she deflected with almost unsuccessfully. She’s still exhausted from getting ripped apart when he took his power back from her. She needs a moment to get her strength back. The Knights bought her the time when they started attacking the demon again along with Alyssa’s magic. The demon mark on her face is now permanently gone. She is also aware that it weakened her to give that kind power up but it was never hers to keep. She hated that power inside her. 

“Gradum retro”, she casted and it threw Marcus back.

She got back on her feet. The Knights are already wounded and despite their healing ability, they’re not healing enough. It breaks her heart to see them in pain for her. It’s not how it’s supposed to be. They are her disciples. She’s supposed to protect them, not the other way around.

“You are not match for me, witch. You know that too”, the demon boasted.

“Why are you wasting your time with them then? I am here, aren’t I?” she retorted.

It’s an empty challenge. He can literally do anything to her and she may be powerless to stop him but at least, it will be her and not them.

“Oh, I am going to kill you but first, I am going to take away everything from you like you took away my reputation, the respect of the Demon Realm from me. You’re going to pain and you will know pain”, he announced.

It’s like déjà vu but for some reason, Vera already knew what he’s going to do but she was frozen. Like slow motion, it happened before her eyes. Marcus turned to her side and with a wave of his hand, Hamish dropped to the ground.

“Hamish!” Lilith screamed.

She did not notice the Knights shifted back to being human. Her eyes glued to Hamish who is lying still on the floor. He is not breathing. She is certain about that. Her breathing almost came to a stop. She knew this is going to happen. She knew Marcus is coming after her weakness. How he figured it out? She does not know. Hamish is dead and once again, it’s because of her. Like her daughter, she failed to protect him. She failed again. The Knights clamored over Hamish while Alyssa and Lilith are trying to revive him with their magic. She was rooted on the spot she stood on. A single tear fell from her eyes. 

“He’s still not breathing!” Randall exclaimed in panic.

It’s really happening. She’s losing another important person in her life. He’s gone like her daughter, both dead. 

“Grand Magus!” Gabrielle yelled but she did not flinch.

She felt a wave of magic. It was Gabrielle casting a protecting spell in front of her. Marcus is attacking her and she’s not doing a thing. Lilith and Alyssa joined in putting a barrier spell around them to prevent Marcus from killing Vera. She cannot take her eyes away from Hamish’ body. 

“We can’t hold it off much longer!” Alyssa declared.

Jack went to Vera and shook her out of the shock.

“Vera! We’re not enough to fight Marcus. We need you!” he said.

When her eyes met his, he felt the pain she’s feeling. He had a taste of it when she drank that mind juice. She shared her pain to everyone, the pain of losing her daughter. That pain has now doubled with losing Hamish. He knows what it felt like to lose everything but that’s nothing compare to losing a child and the only person who managed to break down her walls both in the hands of one enemy.

“Don’t let him die in vain. If you die, Hamish won’t like it”, he said.

Vera turned to Marcus who is exhausting his power by trying to break the barrier spell.

“Initium…” she muttered and Marcus halted.

Vera destroyed the barrier herself and watched the demon became confused by what he’s feeling.

“What did you do now, witch?” he asked her.

“Have you ever heard the story of Trojan Horse?” of course, he does not know that story, “The City of Troy was impenetrable. Every attempt failed. So one night, the enemy announced their surrender and in good faith, they offered a gift in honor of the city, a giant wooden horse. The rulers of the city accepted the gift and allowed it to enter their great city. That very gift was filled with soldiers waiting for the right time to attack. The once impenetrable city had become hell in itself. Just like that, it fell because it was destroyed from within”, she narrated.

“You did something to my power”, Marcus figured out.

“Do you honestly think I will just allow you to rip it out of me just like that? I just did a little modification and put something extra to your power, a virus that corrupts power fast and render it useless. The greater the power, the faster it consumes it…my little Trojan Horse”, she explained.

Marcus groaned but it’s not enough to get him down his knees.

“Ego dabo tibi dolor!” she growled and that put him down his knees in an instant, screaming in pain.

“You’ll pay for this!” the demon exclaimed.

“I got nothing left to lose, Marcus, and that’s thanks to you”, she replied.

The pain intensifies as Vera’s eyes focused on giving him more pain. She needs him to feel what she’s feeling right now, what she has been feeling since that day her daughter died. 

“Mors tua sit voluntas mea fiet”, she recited.

The sound of the agonizing pain Marcus is feeling hurts everyone’s ears except for Vera’s. She loves hearing him like that. It suits him well after everything. For years, she deprived herself of using magic to its full potential but now she’s not going to do that. She has access to every magic available, might as well use it on a demon.

“Stop…” he gritted between his rotting teeth.

Vera looked down on him. He tried to use his power but the pain is overwhelming, his power did not come out at all.

“It’s pathetic what has become of you. For an Emperor Demon, you are worthless”, she spat.

Crushing his ego is an additional torture for him. Vera casted more insults down his way which broke his pride.

A portal broke the scene as another demon entered the earth. Unlike Marcus, he does not look predatory although he looked pitch black darkness. He briefly gazed at Marcus before turning to Vera.

“I hate to intrude in this situation but I must intervene before you kill my brother here”, the demon said. When he realized everyone is confused by his appearance, “oh, I forgot to introduce myself. How rude of me…my name is…”

“Hades”, Vera finished for him.

“Ah”, he suddenly looked impressed, “you really are a clever one. Not just clever, you are also one hell of a witch, no pun intended”, he expressed.

In all the books Alyssa has read, she always thought that Hades, the God of the Underworld, is just a myth. Now, he is standing in front of them, as real as everything else.

“What do you want?” Vera asked.

Hades sighed and looked extremely disappointed on still groaning Marcus on the floor.

“A trade. I want to give you a gift and in return, you will not kill Marcus. I know. I know. You’ll be worried that if you let him go, he’ll do this stunt again but I will assure that I will personally take care of him”, he answered with a smile that looked devious to her.

“…and I am supposed to just take your word for it? I am not stupid”, she scoffed.

“True. Well, I also owe you for not killing Marcus the first time you encountered him. You see, you got all the power in the world to obliterate him that day but you did not and instead you just stopped him from killing people”,

“…the biggest mistake of my whole existence”, she snapped.

“Well, I can fix that for you”, Hades offered. Her silence told him she might be considering it so he went on, “Marcus took the people you love which is foul considering the mercy you showed him. I want to extend the same mercy. I can bring back to life that man on the floor”, Vera turned to a dead Hamish on the floor, “…or I can bring back to life your daughter”, he continued.

Her head snapped fast towards him with a formed frown on her forehead.

“You’re bluffing. My daughter has been dead for twenty years”, she muttered.

“I am a lot of things but when it comes to my power, I don’t bluff. So, who’s it going to be, Grand Magus?” he asked.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm just throwing everything in here, lol. What do you think of this chapter?


	11. The Choice

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> it's a hard one to write but hopefully i succeeded. Let me know what you think of this.

Conflicted, torn, and burning with rage. That’s what fills Vera’s heart at the moment. Two choices are before her and yet she cannot bring herself to choose one. She might be a selfish woman after all. She needs Hamish more than she would like to admit. He saw right through her and dared to love her despite all her flaws, despite being on opposite sides. At the same time, she needs her daughter back. She is a mother and a mother never forget. She will always be a mother and if there’s a chance she can be with her again, she wanted to take it…but in exchange of Hamish? She is not sure if she can make that choice.

“You call this a mercy?” she muttered with her eyes fixed on Hades.

“Well, I can only bring back one. The balance has been thrown off quite a bit already and if I bring back two, well, I will have a problem with other forces out there and   
I cannot risk that at the moment. So, the choice is yours. I bring back your lover, you can pick up right where you left and start a life together whatever life that may be. I bring back your daughter…you can even decide whether you want me to bring her back as a baby or a grown-up lady. Either way, you’ll be a mother again. That void your child left you in your heart will be filled again. I think it’s a win-win situation. You get to be happy with either of the choices”, Hades explained.

It does not feel that way for her. It feels like an ambush. It feels like a death sentence for her heart. How can she choose between the man she loves and her daughter?

She can feel eyes on her back. The others are waiting for her choice. Of course, they are hoping for her to choose their leader, their friend. Will they understand if she picked her daughter instead? Will they understand how much she misses her child?

“How does it feel now, witch?!” Marcus taunted despite being under so much pain.

“BE QUIET!” Hades exclaimed in a thunder-like voice that scared everyone except Vera who is debating inside her brain. The God of the Underworld sighed and turned back to her. “So, who’s it’s going to be, Grand Magus?” he asked her.

Vera glared at his impatience. It’s not like choosing between two dresses to wear. The decision is not easy. She turned to take one last glance at Hamish before blinking her tears away. There is a reluctance in her about letting Marcus go. She can destroy him now but she will lose someone again. Hades is presenting her the opportunity to get one loved one back. She looked back at the God of the Underworld and for a brief moment, they communicated telepathically which impressed Hades even more.

“Interesting choice, Grand Magus”, he muttered and snapped his fingers. “Done. Your turn”, he announced.

“Finem doloris”, she casted and Marcus breathed a sigh of relief.

The Emperor of Death attempted to come after her again but Hades waved his hand and Marcus was sent back to hell in an instant.

“It is really a pity we have met like this, Grand Magus. We could have achieved so much together. You could have ruled the underworld with me and you’ll never know what pain feels like ever again”, Hades muttered.

“Save it. Bribery does not get anywhere with me and you know it. Keep your emperors on leash”, Vera replied coldly.

The God smirked, still impressed at her resolve.

“Will do, Grand Magus. Till’ we meet again and I am certain that we will”, he bid goodbye and then disappeared.

Lilith fumed in anger as she cradles Hamish onto the floor. Her eyes turned to Vera as they lit up in blue. Randall is also boiling. 

“You selfish b—”

“Stop!” Jack stood in between Lilith and Vera who has her back turned on them. 

Randall was planning on joining Lilith’s rage but Gabrielle blocked his way with a disapproving look on her face. The room is tensed. The Knights are clearly divided. The tension breaks when Hamish suddenly coughs and slowly comes to. They all looked at him in surprise except for Vera. Lilith and Randall went to his side.

“Take it easy, buddy”, Randall said with a smile.

“It’s alright. It’s over now”, Lilith added with a softer tone.

Jack confusingly turned to Vera who is not looking at them. He thought she has chosen her daughter over Hamish but Hamish is now breathing and he sees no child anywhere. She chose Hamish.

“Vera…” he tried to call her but she only raised her hand to stop him.

Alyssa and Gabrielle looked warily at the Grand Magus’ direction. They don’t know how they will approach her. For the Knights, the obvious decision is to choose Hamish because he’s their friend and leader but they’re not the Knights, not originally. Vera is not a Knight. She is the Grand Magus and a mother who chose Hamish over her child.

“Where’s Vera?” Hamish asked, his eyes searching for her.

Vera closed her eyes upon hearing his voice. It is enough. She thought she will never his voice ever again. He’s back. It’s a good thing but she feels like dying. Hamish sat up and looked at her back. She is not turning to look at him. He does not understand why.

“Vera, what’s wrong?” he asked.

“Deferatur”, Vera muttered and she disappeared from the temple, out of their reach.

Shocked, Hamish turned to the others for answers.

“We best get dressed first and fix ourselves. You got a lot to catch up on”, Jack said to him.

They narrated to Hamish everything that has happened while he was ‘dead’. He listened intently to every detail of what he missed while keeping his expression blank. After they’re finished, he removed the blanket from his shoulders and got up from the chair.

“I need to see her”, he muttered.

“Whoa, wait…you still need to rest. You just literally got back from the dead”, Randall tried to stop him.

“Get out of the way, Randall”, Hamish breathed out.

“Just take it easy”, Randall insisted which is only met with Hamish growling at him. Randall backed off and let Hamish walked away. “What’s wrong with him?” he asked.

“You insensitive bastard”, he turned to Gabrielle, “Vera chose to bring him back instead of her daughter and you’re ready to jump on her when you thought she did not choose Hamish. Do you really think it’s that easy to choose between the person you love and your own child? Now, you’re trying to stop Hamish from talking to her. At least, he is sensitive enough to worry about the Grand Magus’ state of mind right now because she just lost her daughter for the second time by choosing Hamish”, she exclaimed and walked away as well.

Alyssa would have wanted to stay but aside from being exhausted, the reaction of both Lilith and Randall earlier upset her so she started walking. Jack joined her with a disappointed look on his face. Randall and Lilith were left at the temple, contemplating their sudden outburst towards Vera.

“We messed up, don’t we?” she asked.

“I think so”, he answered.

\--------------------------------

Hamish first went to Vera’s house to look for her but she’s not there. He searched every room in her spacious house but she’s nowhere to be found. He scoured the entire campus hoping she went back to her office but there’s no sign of her. He does not know where else to look. It’s not like Vera likes to drive around every now and then. She mostly keeps herself at her house, at her office at the university, and at the temple.

As last resort and he knows it’s foul to do it, Hamish used his sensitive smell to track Vera’s scent. He swore not to use his werewolf’s ability on her but he’s desperate. He needs to know how she’s doing. He knows how important her daughter was to her and for her to make the choice that she did, it must be killing her inside now. He started tracking her scent as Tundra is very familiar with it. It did not take him long before he found her and he should have thought of it before. It’s no surprise he would find her at the cemetery.

Vera is sitting on the grass, her eyes fixed on the headstone of Isabelle Stone. It’s her daughter’s grave.

“I never told you where my daughter is buried”, she said letting him know that she’s aware of his presence.

“I did not know until now. I tracked your scent”, 

She did not react. 

“Talk to me”, he demanded.

“…and what do you want me to say?” she asked.

“Anything that comes to your mind”, he sighed, “Why me? You did not have to choose me, Vera. I would have understood. Your daughter was more important than a werewolf like me”, he answered.

He will gladly give his life if it means he can get her daughter back for her. If he can make her truly happy, he will do it.

“I chose you because I already grieved my daughter. I had lived years without her but I don’t know how to grieve you or if I can go through with that…so, I chose you”, she explained.

Shocked by her reason, he crouched beside her and looked at her face. There is an evident emptiness in her eyes.

“I am sorry you have to make that kind of choice”, he said.

“Honestly, I should be crying right now. I thought I would, but I cannot bring myself to cry. Nothing is coming out. I’ve been sitting here for hours now and there’s nothing. I tried to justify my decision. I thought about how unfair it would be for her to be here knowing what’s going on with the Order. I am the Grand Magus and I basically live inside my office. I wouldn’t have time for her. We just survived Rogwan, Praxis, and Marcus. This is not an ideal time to have a child. I am not even sure I will be a good mother. All of those reasoning are practically lame ass excuses on my part. I know it’s not why I did it. I did not pick her because I am what your friends had called me. I am selfish. I chose myself, what I want, before my daughter…and that’s you. I don’t want to lose you and so I let go of her”, she scoffed, “…definitely not a character for motherhood”, she confessed without looking at him.

His hand found hers and he squeezed it lightly, just enough to let her know he’s there with her. She squeezed back and held on to him like her life depends on it. She needs him to be his anchor. The lack of emotion is threatening to turn her numb. She does not want to float away.

“Come on, let me take you home. You don’t have your coat with you. You’re already cold”, he whispered to her ear.

She did not resist nor protest when he used his strength to lift her up. None of them have car since she teleported there and Hamish ran to find her. They walked until he decided to scoop her up and carried her on his arms. She let him. He chose to use the path in the woods to avoid students from seeing the state the Chancellor is in. she is completely disconnected from everything. She’s there but she’s not there. When they reached her house, Hamish put her on her bed and went to the kitchen to get her a glass of tea to warm her. She did not move a spot from where he left her.

“Drink this. It will warm you up”, he said and she mindlessly took a few sips before handing him the cup back.

“You don’t have to stay. I’ll be fine”, she muttered.

“Oh, you’re not getting rid of me, Vera. I’m not leaving you. I already told you that before. I am here to stay. Now, lay down. You need to rest”, he insisted.

He lay her down the bed and removed her heels for her. He tucked her in and gently brushed his hand over her face and hair. He knows she’s no comfortable having someone take care of her but it’s all he wants to do. He wants to take care of her.

“Will you hold me?” she then asked.

Hamish nodded, removed his shoes and climbed over the bed and spooned her. She’s not the type to crave being spooned but she needs to feel something. She needs to feel his warmth, his love. She needs to have something to anchor her down before she completely fades away.

“Sleep. I’ll still be here when you wake up. I promise”, he whispered.

Vera pulled him closer to her body before she finally allowed herself to succumb to sleep.


	12. Bring It On

Days passed and things are so normal it felt odd to the people present few days back when the Emperor of Death and the God of the Underworld were in their temple. None of the other disciples knew what happened. Alyssa was also inducted back to the Order and since Vera used Respondio to the other disciples, no one remember of her involvement with Praxis or her death. Sometimes, things are tensed inside the temple due to rivalry between the disciples and the Knights. Some of the disciples don’t accept them as part of the Order but the Knights brushed them off because they know better.

Vera went on her business the usual way. With Kepler’s death being dealt with, she got the Council off her back. They had appointed a new Gnostic Council Head but he’s not like Kepler. He is more concerned with glamor and appearances than dwelling with the Grand Magus’ business. Plus, he is afraid of her. She buried herself with work both as Grand Magus and the Chancellor of Belgrave University. It worked well for her. It does not allow her to think of anything else or to feel anything else. It’s not like she feels anything else. She has not been feeling anything since that day. She tried letting it out, relieving herself of the weight in her chest but it’s to no avail so she just pushed herself to be productive.

Hamish is gravely worried about her. He knows what she’s doing and he tried to coax her from it but she insisted that it’s the only way she knows how to move forward. He understands that it is what she did after her daughter died when she was young. She has thrown herself into studies and training with the Order until she achieved the position of being a Temple Magus and the school’s Chancellor. After all, she was the youngest to be ever named Temple Magus which meant she put in hard work to get there. He’s scared that it’s happening again. She’s pouring all she got into work just to escape the pain. She barely opens up to him anymore and when they talk, it’s always about the Order’s business.

After conducting a ritual, Vera had instructed the acolytes to clean up while talking to the Magistratus when Angus decided to take the chance and throw a tantrum.

“Why don’t they clean this up?” he exclaimed. Vera slowly turned to him with a blank expression on her face. “You always favor those dogs. They’re not practitioners and everyone knows that. First, you inducted them and they stole from the Order. Instead of punishing them, you promoted them to Magistratus, all because you’re sleeping with one of them!” he added.

Hamish let out a low grumble as his eyes turned blue. The others reacted the same. Vera remained calm.

“If I say I don’t intend to demote them or make them clean those mess, what would you do?” she asked.

“Then, you don’t deserve to be our Grand Magus”, Angus spat.

It’s what did it.

“Respirare prohibere”, she casted and Angus grasped his neck, desperate for air. “…and you don’t deserve to be part of the Order. You don’t like the way I run things, just say a word and I will spare you of any hardships and kick you out of this society. If you want to stay, then learn to keep your mouth shut and obey because the next time you speak to your Grand Magus or any of your superior that way ever again, I will not be so merciful the second time. Nod if you agree”, Angus nodded as he turns purple. “Revertetur ex aere”, she muttered and Angus gasped the newfound oxygen entering his lungs once again.

“Forgive me, Grand Magus”, Angus managed to say.

“Anyone else wants to let me know what’s on your mind?” everyone shook their heads in fear. “Very well, clean this mess before noon. I want it spotless”, she ordered and walked away.

The Knights looked at each other in confusion and shock. What Angus did was foul but Vera never reacted to that extreme.

“I’ll talk to her”, Hamish volunteered.

He followed her to her office and closed the door. She’s already at her desk working on loads of paperwork.

“What is it, Mr. Duke?” she asked in all businesslike. 

“Okay, stop it and drop it”, he muttered and she glanced at him. “This got to stop. I know you’re trying to deal things your own way but this is not healthy anymore. You’re channeling in a different sort of outlet and it’s anger and disconnection. What happened earlier with Angus, you know that it’s not something you would do if you got a clear head. That’s rather impulsive and you’re not fond of terrorizing your disciples. You’re strict, yes, but not cruel”, he expressed.

Vera put her pen down. 

“Hamish, can we talk about this later? I got a lot of work to do. This is not a place for this”, she requested.

“No. There is no right place for this. Come on. Just talk to me. I know you can’t cry and it’s frustrating but there are other ways to ease pain and you can start with me. I am here. I can be your sounding board. Tell me things. I don’t care how random it will be. Don’t shut me out and lock yourself in brick walls you built around yourself. This is not like the last time you lost her. You’re not alone anymore. You got me”, he insisted.

The mention of her daughter ignites a spark in her and not the good one. He saw how fury emerged in her eyes. She does not like talking about it nor hearing anything about it.

“I told you to bring this up later”, she gritted between her teeth.

“Let me in. Please. Bottling emotions won’t do you good. It will only make you feel like a goddamn robot and you’re far from that”, he pushed once more.

Vera’s palm hit her desk and produced a loud thud which startled Hamish a bit and she rose from her seat to walk around.

“What do you want me to say, Hamish? I tried easing the pain but I can’t let it out. I’m stuck! I so badly want to cry that I even consider using a spell to do it but that’s too pathetic to even try. An acolyte disrespected not only me but you and your Knights and you expected me to what? Be generous? He needs to learn his place and that’s one way of reminding him that fast”, she yelled.

Better, he thought.

“Maybe don’t just focus on crying. You can start by accepting, Vera”, he retorted.

It added fuel to the fire.

“Oh, now you’re psychoanalyzing me? Perfect! Just what I needed! I don’t need advice from you or anything from you. In fact, I don’t want to see you again. Don’t come to my home again. Don’t come to my office again. I don’t need a reminder of how I screw up everything I touch!” she exclaimed.

There is a pause. 

They looked at each other as she catches her breath after her rant. He simply allowed her to rest. When he saw her breathing levelled, a smirk appeared on his lips.

“How does it feel?” he asked.

“Surprisingly good”, she answered.

It’s all intentional. Hamish couldn’t think of anything else to get her feeling emotion again. When he saw how she reacted to Angus after he insulted all of them, he saw potential that he can wake her emotions by triggering her anger. It was a risk and it may go horribly but it paid off. 

“Good to have you back”, he greeted smugly.

She blinked a few times, realizing what he did for her. It was a clever move. 

“How did you figure it out? I’ve been trying to days to pour my guts out and I have been failing”, she asked.

“…because it’s what I did when I lost Cassie. Like you, I resorted to being productive just to avoid dealing with it. I devoted myself in being a better Knight, better leader. I looked after Lilith and Randall and in the process, I closed off on myself. I couldn’t bring myself to cry when I visit her grave. I almost felt nothing. I was like a vessel for Tundra and nothing more. Then, Randall messed up my bar at the den. It annoyed me but not enough. For the first time, I felt something other than empty void in my heart. I focused on that, desperate to feel something, to be able to connect. I got drunk and got into fights. I did anything that will get to my nerves. I made myself angry deliberately until I felt lighter and lighter”,

He stepped closer to her, closing the distance between them. He then cupped her face with his hands so he can look directly at her eyes.

“It’s not easy. It will never go away, the pain. You already know that but you also know that it will get better in time. It’s slow but you don’t have to do it alone. I am here and I don’t fake it when I say I understand because I do. Don’t shut me out again. If you ever feel the need to feel something, get mad at me. Pick a fight with me. I will humor you, make you angrier even. I’ll do anything to make you feel better. I promised to take care of you and I am still doing that”, he answered.

Her tears finally graced them with their presence. For days, she’s been seeking for them to come out and now they do. Hamish allowed them to fall down her cheeks and she started sobbing. All the dam needs are little cracks for it to break. He needs her to let go. He needs her to feel the pain and not shove it inside her and just let it fester. He succeeded finally.

“I don’t know what I ever did to deserve you. I certainly stepped on a lot of toes in my life”, she said while her head is pressed against his chest.

“You complimented my drink”, she looked up to him with a raised eyebrow. “That’s all it took. I knew in that moment that I am yours. I’m that easy”, he teased and she smiled her precious smile.

“It’s not going to be easy being with me, Hamish. I don’t do passion very well and my first instinct to push people away”, she warned.

“Sounds like an invitation”, he acknowledged.

“It’s going to be like hell”, she added.

“Well then, drag me to hell. I’ll be your willing servant”, he accepted. “I love you, Vera, and nothing you can say will ever change that”, he declared.

“I guess it’s obvious by now that I love you too”, she replied in her own style which he loves.

Hamish leaned down and pressed his lips over hers. Life will never be easy for a werewolf and the Grand Magus but they always have each other and their friends. They will weather every storm that comes their way and if they can survive demons from hell, well, they can survive anything life throws at them.

~~FIN~~

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First of all, i would like to thank all of you for the positive responses. This is my first time writing fic from The Order and i must say, i really enjoy it!!! i appreciate your kind words and i hope to get more inspire in the future. THANK YOU SO MUCH!!!


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